


And I Will Try to Fix You

by Dawn on ICE (Dawn_Blossom)



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: (will tag more as needed), I intend fluff eventually, I promise I intend a happy ending, M/M, Some angst, Time Travel, Vitya's POV, but there's also a lot of my sad!Victor headcanons, young Victor is called Vitya, young Yuuri is called Yuuri-chan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-03-11
Packaged: 2018-09-17 22:52:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 20,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9349781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dawn_Blossom/pseuds/Dawn%20on%20ICE
Summary: 16 year old VIctor Nikiforov may be lonely, but he isn't sure how getting thrust into the future to live with his older self and his older self's fiancé is going to help anything.Oh, and the 16 year old version of his older self's fiancé is there, too.==Chinese translation byshikicrosscan be foundhere





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've seen several fics where a younger VIctor is brought to the future, but none where a younger Yuuri goes to the future? So I thought "why not both?" and thus you have this.
> 
> And I thought to myself "this is a humorous premise! make it funny!" but then... all of my lonely!Victor headcanons got in the way, and... well... I have a happy ending planned, okay!!!
> 
> But, er... I have to warn you now... Classes start for me tomorrow, and this semester seems like it's going to be pretty challenging (it's my last semester as an undergrad!!! can you believe), and I kind of have a bad track record of finishing fics that I start while school's in session... so, uh, what I'm saying is that I cannot 100% promise that I will finish this... But I'll try! I like this concept a lot and I have a story I want to tell with it, so... Yeah, I'll try not to give up!
> 
> Oh, by the way, when classes are in session, I stay in the dorms Monday-Friday and come home on the weekends. I only really let myself have fun online on the weekends, so... Yeah, I won't be checking AO3 during the school week. But! If you really want me to see something you have to say, you can contact me on tumblr at [eff-supp.tumblr.com](http://eff-supp.tumblr.com/) (Keep in mind I'll be on mobile, so... you all know how bad tumblr mobile can be, right? I deeply apologize if I miss anything) Also, I'm warning you now, my blog looks fine now, but the second I get back to classes it's going to turn into 90% me complaining, 9% me liveblogging my writing/research assignments, and like 1% everything else.

When Victor wakes up, he’s immediately accosted by a sudden feeling of _wrongness._

He’s on an unfamiliar couch in an unfamiliar apartment. A quick glance out the window tells him that he’s still in Saint Petersburg, but he certainly isn’t at Yakov’s place like he’s supposed to be.

A wave of fear overtakes him. He’s 16 and beautiful and he just won gold in the Junior World Championships. Getting kidnapped had never been a fear for him, but… It wasn’t out of the question.

Victor sighs. Sure, he had _just_ been bemoaning his own loneliness before he went to sleep (after having his romantic advances rejected by the silver medalist… Victor had thought that they’d had chemistry together, but apparently the guy had _always_ seen Victor as “abrasive and condescending” and… it hurt, actually. A lot.)

But just because he might be a little lonely doesn’t mean he wanted to be kidnapped! 

Only… if someone has really kidnapped him, they’ve done a terrible job. Not only is Victor completely free to move, but the windows have no blinds, the door is unlockable, and absolutely no one is guarding him. He can just walk out if he wants to! And he almost does, except he hears a thud followed by a pained cry coming from the bedroom.

Victor’s more or less convinced by now that he hasn’t actually been kidnapped (maybe he’d drank more alcohol than he thought he had and everything afterwards had been a dream… maybe getting rejected had been a dream, too… and he had accidentally spent the night on some poor sap’s couch. Yakov would kill him for this, but at least he wasn’t going to die alone in a ditch somewhere.)

So whoever cried out probably isn’t going to hurt him. And maybe Victor should apologize for whatever he’d done the previous night that required him to take up a stranger’s couch. 

So Victor enters the bedroom (its door was _wide open,_ so it was probably okay) and is surprised to find a black-haired teenager about his own age sprawled on the floor. He looks confused right up until he sees Victor, and then understanding flashes across his features.

Victor wishes he understood, too.

The other teenager says something, but it’s in… Japanese, he thinks… and Victor can only frown in confusion. He’s sure they’re in Saint Petersburg, so what’s with the Japanese?

“I’m sorry I don’t speak Japanese,” Victor says politely in Russian. When that draws only a blank response, he tries again. “How did we speak before? English? Français?”

The pains of being multilingual… 

“English,” the other teenager says after a pause. “Funny, language has never been a problem between us in my dreams before.”

“Is this a dream?” Victor asks, mostly to himself, but for some reason it makes his companion laugh.

“Of course. One, your hair’s long, even though you cut it last month…”

Strange. Victor can’t imagine ever cutting his hair. Maybe this really is a dream.

“… and two, you’re _Victor Nikiforov_ and you’re here with _me._ ”

Oh, so this guy knows who he is. That puts Victor at a disadvantage.

“And… who _are_ you?” Victor asks.

“Yuuri Katsuki,” the other teenager replies, smiling sadly. “I wanted you to know me as a skater one day, but… I guess this is the most I’ll ever get.”

Victor is about to try to respond to that (frankly tragic) statement, but then Yuuri is coming closer, and his hand brushes Victor’s cheeks gently, and Victor’s heart aches so much he can hardly think straight.

“You usually do this to me in my dreams, but you don’t mind if I change things up, do you?”

And then Yuuri is kissing him softly, like Victor imagines someone might do if they cared about him, and Victor is melting.

_’It’s just a dream,’_ he reminds himself.

But it’s a very nice dream. Victor pulls Yuuri closer, and Yuuri doesn’t pull away, and It’s just nice.

“You don’t think I’m abrasive? Condescending?” Victor asks desperately when they part for breath. It might be stupid and petty, but he wants to hear that he isn’t, even if it’s only his dream.

“No,” Yuuri breathes, and Victor is so relieved that he feels like he could sink to the floor. “You’re wonderful the way you are. More than I could ever ask for.”

“You wouldn’t reject me if I asked you out, Yuuri?” Victor continues, his breathing heavy. “You wouldn’t leave me because you found an ice dancer who’s prettier? You wouldn’t invite me to your room and make me give you everything and then tell me you already have someone at home and it all meant nothing?”

“Victor…” 

Are those tears forming at the edges of Yuuri’s eyes? Oops, maybe Victor had gone too far, even for a dream…

“I wouldn’t do any of those things! I just want to make you smile!” Yuuri’s arms tighten around Victor. “You’re all I’ve ever wanted! If I ever had the chance to be with you, I’d never leave.”

Yes, that’s exactly what Victor wants to hear. And it’s all an illusion.

“I wish you were real, Yuuri,” Victor says, pressing another kiss to his lips. And then he lets himself fall backwards, because there’s a bed right behind him, and why would it be there if he wasn’t supposed to get on it?

He grins up at Yuuri, and Yuuri grins back, and it probably would have been a great ending to his dream if only they didn’t get interrupted by… another Yuuri?

At the door (still wide open) stands someone who looks exactly like Yuuri, only he’s older, and his mouth is hanging open in surprise.

“V-Victor!” he yells. “I need you to come here right now!”

And Victor is horribly confused, because he is here! What’s happening?

But then another man appears, and he looks just like an older version of Victor… with shorter hair.

“Oh,” the older Victor says in shock. “Yuuri, are you seeing this, too?”

“What?” the younger Yuuri responds.

“Yes,” the older Yuuri responds simultaneously.

So Victor sighs and sits up on the bed. Obviously his dream has derailed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 2, because it's written.
> 
> I'm sure that me writing these negative emotions is in no way a response to the stress of starting a new semester. Hahahaha, of course it's not :))))
> 
> Okay, but seriously, can I just give Vitya a hug?

“Vitya…”

They’re calling him Vitya just because he happens to be younger, and he hates it but it’s also a logical thing to do, so while he crosses his arms in frustration, he offers no protest.

“…and Yuuri-chan…”

The younger Yuuri is getting the same treatment, and honestly, he looks like he’s about to die.

“… both of you just appeared in our apartment for no apparent reason…” Yuuri says slowly.

“Yes,” Vitya and Yuuri-chan chorus.

“… and both of you thought you were dreaming…” Victor says, continuing for Yuuri.

Yuuri-chan covers his face with his hands, not speaking. Yuuri reaches over to pat him on the shouder. (It looks surreal.)

“I, for one, was enjoying myself when I thought I was dreaming,” Vitya says.

He grins at Yuuri-chan, but the other teenager’s head is still in his hands. Vitya’s smile fades to a neutral expression, and he twirls a strand of his hair through his fingers, feigning nonchalance. He tries to pretend that he doesn’t feel hurt by the reaction, but he’s not very convincing.

 _’Why did you think he meant anything by what he said?’_ he admonishes himself. _’Just because it’s not a dream doesn’t make it real! How many times do you have to learn this lesson?’_

“Victor, what are we supposed to do about this? I certainly don’t remember this ever happening!” Yuuri says worriedly, and Victor pulls him closer. Apparently, his mere touch can make Yuuri relax.

Vitya feels like his heart is crumbling.

“We’ll figure it out,” Victor says reassuringly. “After all, we haven’t disappeared, so it’s not like our past selves can be stuck here forever. We still exist, Yuuri!”

Yuuri does not look reassured. 

“Victor, we have to train! What are we supposed to do, bring them to the rink with us?”

“Sure! Who knows how long they’ll be here? They should stay in shape for when they get back.”

Yuuri-chan has finally removed his face from his hands, but he looks more uncomfortable than ever

“Er… there’s really no reason for me to go to the rink…” he says hesitantly. “… since I’m going to quit skating…”

“ _What?_ ” Victor shouts, throwing his hands up in the air. “Yuuri, this is all wrong! Are they from different universes than us? Why does he want to quit at 16?”

Yuuri rolls his eyes.

“Calm down, Victor. I thought about quitting a lot, okay? At 16… yeah, it was pretty bad. I was doing alright in Juniors, but I didn’t think I was ever going to be good enough to go on to the senior division,” Yuuri admits with a sigh.

Poor Yuuri-chan looks miserable at his words. Vitya scowls. 

_’Isn’t he just making things worse?’_

“Well, you obviously changed your mind,” Vitya breaks in. “What made you decide to stay?”

Yuuri smiles faintly.

“I’m not sure. One day I was dead-set on quitting, but then the next… I just remembered how much skating meant to me, and how I didn’t want to give it up. It helped that I started winning competitions after this, and… I stayed.”

“You were always mentally strong, my love,” Victor whispers into Yuuri’s ear (loud enough for Vitya to hear, ugh). “I’m so glad you decided to stay.”

And Vitya feels like his entire soul is burning, an endless inferno of… jealousy is the emotion he’s looking for.

He hates the feeling, and he hates knowing what it is.

And yet Yuuri-chan wins in the misery department again.

“I’m happy for you,” he says, despite the fact that there has surely never been a person who looked less happy. “But… Victor’s probably right about me being from a different universe… I don’t… I could never… I’m just wasting everyone’s time by being mediocre. I should get a job and support the family. I should…”

This whole spiel is just making Vitya angry.

“Shut up! Is this why you said I wouldn’t know you as a skater? Because you’re just going to quit?” he spits out bitterly.

“Uh, yeah, I mean…”

“How can you be so selfish?” He sees Victor flinch, but Yuuri lays a hand on his shoulder and oh, that makes everything better. Vitya seethes. “Maybe _I_ want to see you skate in the senior division!”

Yuuri-chan glares at him (but at least he’s looking at him?).

“Funny that you’re calling me selfish,” he says coldly, “when you’re the one making it about you.”

And he’s _right_ and Vitya wants to scream.

“No!” Vitya yells. “You don’t get to do this! You don’t get to say things like ‘if I had the chance to be with you I’d never leave’ and then do this! Just leave? I haven’t even met you yet and you’re already leaving me? I hate you, Yuuri!”

(He forgets to add the –chan, but it doesn’t really matter. He hates both Yuuris right now. Victor, too. And himself.)

Angry tears roll down his face and he can’t deal with this right now. He storms off to the only room in this unfamiliar apartment that he knows, the bedroom, and slams the door shut behind him.

He crawls into the bed (that Victor and Yuuri share) and picks the side he thinks he wouldn’t sleep on to bury himself into. He cries into the pillow. He hopes it’s Yuuri’s pillow and he hopes he sees it later and feels bad about himself.

(Yuuri _should_ feel bad about himself. He should have seen how upset Yuuri-chan was and done something to help. How could he not help his own younger self? And Victor… Victor should have helped _him_ before he got to this point. Victor had no care for his younger self, either! And Yuuri-chan… Well, Vitya had already said what he needed to about Yuuri-chan.)

Sobs rack his body, and he knows one thing.

He’s never leaving this room ever again.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vitya gets a hug! Too bad it's only from his older self!
> 
> I didn't want to leave for school on such a sad chapter. So how about a _slightly_ less sad chapter?

Vitya isn’t sure how long he’s been lying in the bed, but he’s not surprised when the door opens (he should’ve locked it, but it’s not his home… he couldn’t…) and someone walks in. After all, he had known that he couldn’t _really_ stay there forever.

“Vitya.” Victor’s voice is soft. 

The bed shifts to accommodate the new weight of Victor sitting down. Vitya feels a hand comb through his hair.

_’Stop it. I don’t want your comfort.’_

Except he doesn’t say that, and it was a lie anyway.

“Poor Vitya. I forgot what it was like at your age. You still think nobody loves you.”

Victor’s voice is gentle, but it still rakes him like claws.

He jolts upwards, flinging Victor’s arm away as he turns to stare at the man he’s apparently going to become.

“You say that like you think somebody does,” Vitya says harshly.

“Your rinkmates—“

“Hate me,” Vitya finishes.

“Yakov—“

“Wishes I’d shut up,” Vitya insists.

Victor sighs.

“Fine. Then I love you.”

Vitya scowls.

“Of course you love yourself.”

_’Conceited.’_

Victor pulls him forward into an embrace (how pathetic, he’s still the one who has to comfort himself) and Vitya lets himself bury his face in his older self’s shoulder.

“My only love is figure skating,” he hisses under his breath. “I do better on my own.”

Victor’s fingers comb through his hair again.

“By next year you’ll actually believe that,” he tells him softly.

 _’Good,’_ he thinks. _’That must mean it’s right.’_

Victor stands up, pulling Vitya with him.

“Yuuri took Yuuri-chan shopping,” Victor tells him. “We didn’t have enough food to cook for four,” he explains.

“So it’s just us,” Vitya concludes.

“It’s just us,” Victor confirms. “Why don’t you come have something to drink?”

It’s only because his body is thirsty. He’s been crying. It isn’t good to dehydrate. That’s the only reason he accepts. He hasn’t forgiven anyone. He still hurts. 

And so he sits on the couch and lets Victor bring him a cup.

“You’re sure you want water?” Victor asks.

“Yes,” Vitya says through gritted teeth.

“You know it’s _actually_ water and not vodka, right?”

“Is vodka an option?” Vitya asks as he grabs the cup.

“Not for you,” Victor says, laughing like it’s a hilarious joke. “I, on the other hand—“

But they’re interrupted by Yuuri walking in the front door, followed by Yuuri-chan. Both have their hands full. Victor rushes over to help Yuuri, and Vitya wonders if he’s expected to help Yuuri-chan… Well, too bad. Victor’s hands are full, too. He takes a sip of water.

“I thought this would be a good time to make katsudon,” Yuuri says in the kitchen (though Vitya does not turn to look). “It’s not as good as my mom’s, but…”

“Yuuri!” Victor exclaims excitedly. “Can I help you?”

His voice is full of warmth and happiness. Vitya doesn’t think his own voice has ever sounded quite like that… maybe with Makka, but…

But speaking of Makka, the dog is nowhere to be found. Vitya can see pictures of him on the walls, even some with Yuuri and Makka, but… no dog, no food bowls, no leash…

His stomach drops.

 _’I’m 11 years in the future,’_ he reminds himself. _’Dogs don’t live forever…’_

But still, the evident loss of his only friend hits him hard. He takes another sip, and another, and then one more, just to make sure he drowns the lump that wants to form in his throat.

He looks up from the water, and… Oh, Yuuri-chan is staring at him.

_’Why are you always looking miserable, Yuuri-chan? I liked it better when you were smiling.’_

He doesn’t say that, of course. He doesn’t say anything. He takes a sip of water.

“V-Vitya, I…” Yuuri-chan starts hesitantly. 

Vitya flashes him his charming I-want-to-leave-but-there-are-a-bunch-of-cameras-here-so-I’m-trapped smile.

“No worries, Yuuri-chan. Everything is in the past,” he says with false cheer.

“No, I have to apologize!” Yuuri-chan insists, bowing deeply. “You were right. I said things to you that I couldn’t back up. W-What I want and what I’m capable of are… they’ve always been different. So I’m sorry that I can’t skate with you. I’m sorry we’ll never meet in competition. I wanted it, but…”

Vitya frowns.

“Don’t get so upset. You don’t owe me anything,” he waves off the apology. He takes a sip of water. “We haven’t even met.”

Yuuri shakes his head vigorously.

“I haven’t met 20 year old Victor Nikiforov,” Yuuri says, his voice desperate. “But I’ve met _you_ and I _hurt_ you and I… I never wanted to…”

Vitya’s mouth feels dry. He takes a—wait, where has all his water gone?

He sets his cup down on the table. He wonders if Yuuri-chan notices the way his hand trembles.

“I forgive you, Yuuri-chan,” he says quietly. 

They stare at each other for a few moments. Yuuri-chan looks like he doesn’t know what to do, like he never thought he was going to get this far.

Vitya pats the seat next to him on the couch.

“Sit down before you faint or something,” he says. He has a horrible feeling that his face is flushed, but… it’s not like Yuuri-chan’s face is any better.

“Thanks,” Yuuri-chan mumbles, taking the offered spot.

And before it can get awkward, Vitya turns his head towards the kitchen.

“Hey, Victor, bring me more water! And get some for Yuuri-chan, too!”

Yuuri-chan’s eyes widen.

“N-No, I can get it myself,” he protests, but Vitya grabs his hand before he can stand up.

“But I want you to sit with me,” he tells him.

 _’Stay with me,’_ he thinks. His heart aches.

Yuuri-chan stays.

Vitya’s forgiven Yuuri-chan. It was so easy. But his heart still aches.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everybody! I'm sure you'll all be pleased to know that the first week of classes did not, in fact, kill me (though it came close!), although I was on the brink of tears on several occasions... But y'know what, that's okay, because if Yuuri can go from crying in the bathroom to winning silver in the GPF, then I can go from crying in class to acing my courses, right? I mean, I'm a real person and not a fictional character, but... 
> 
> Anyway, I have sooo much work this semester... 18 hours doesn't SOUND that bad ("oh, only one more class than the standard 15 hours") but... if you take a bunch of reading-heavy courses... you will have to devote your life to reading, like I have to... so... I'm just letting you know this so if you come across this situation in your life, you can be prepared...
> 
> So, uh, yeah, I'm updating right now, but... I might have to sacrifice my weekends for the sake of my studies in the future.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you'll like this chapter! It's actually very important... for Yuuri-chan, especially, and I almost which I was switching POVs with this story so I could give you his side (but not really, because I love writing Vitya's POV). What I want you to keep in mind is that Yuuri-chan has just finished seeing his idol break down, and then combined with the events of this chapter, well... he's starting to realize that maybe the god of skating is actually just as mortal as Yuuri-chan himself is.

Dinner is, admittedly, delicious. Vitya had never really thought about it before, but his cooking expertise is basically limited to… potatoes… Yes, he can cook potatoes rather well, but as for anything else… 

He’d never even thought about a future that didn’t involve him living off premade meals… To be fair, he had the money for it, and it wasn’t like he had ever had the opportunity for homecooked meals before, but now that he has the chance to taste Yuuri’s cooking, he can’t help but feel even more jealous of his future self.

“Is it alright?” Yuuri asks everyone at the table. He wears a nervous smile, as if he’s actually concerned about their opinion. Shouldn’t he already know how they’ll all react? 

“You know I love katsudon,” Victor says. He looks lovingly up at Yuuri, and Vitya knows what he’s really saying is “I love you.”

Vitya quickly looks down at his bowl, shoveling a bite into his mouth just to give him enough time to school his features into a proper reaction.

“Forget what I said earlier about loving the ice,” he says, looking at Victor. “I’m leaving it for this food. My true love is actually katsudon,” he jokes.

He had meant it as a joke, yes, but it really hadn’t been _that_ funny. And yet Victor bursts into laughter. He gets up from his seat just to whisper something into Yuuri’s ear.

Yuuri, who already had a slight blush on his cheeks, flushes deeper. He pushes Victor back with his hand, only his hand doesn’t actually leave Victor’s shoulder. They’re still touching. Even when Yuuri pushes Victor _away,_ he doesn’t want him _gone_ and it’s so different from anything Vitya has experienced in the past.

_’I want that,’_ he thinks. _’What does it take to get that?’_

He glances at Yuuri-chan sitting beside him. He’s been quiet this whole time, though he’s smiling slightly as he watches their future selves interact.

“So, Yuuri-chan, what do you think?” Vitya asks, drawing him into the conversation. “Is this an authentic katsudon experience?”

“Well, Yuuri was right that it’s not exactly like my mom’s, but… it’s actually really close,” Yuuri-chan says, and the smile he was already sporting grows ever so slightly when he looks at Vitya.

And it’s really not fair. They aren’t their future selves. Interrupted “dream” makeout session aside, it’s not like they really have anything together. There are no rings on their fingers to bind them for eternity. And yet, even so, there’s something in Yuuri-chan’s happiness that Vitya wants to protect.

_’I’m unhappy because I keep picking terrible people to fall in love with. Well, I’m not going to be so stupid this time,’_ he tells himself. _’My feelings are not going any further than this, no matter what my older self does with his Yuuri. I already know I can’t have anything. There’s no point in hoping.’_

“… and maybe I can cook at the onsen when I retire,” Yuuri-chan says. Vitya didn’t catch the first part of the statement, but what he hears makes him frown.

But he really can’t tell Yuuri-chan what to do, and he’s already made his displeasure known, so he bites his tongue.

“I’ll retire early just to eat there every day,” he says instead.

Actually, now that he thinks about it, it could be fun. He could win a couple more gold medals in Seniors, retire when he’s at his peak, go meet Yuuri-chan in Japan… ( _’Stop that thought there,’_ he tells himself.)

Yuuri-chan looks a little horrified, though.

“You can’t actually retire for katsudon!” he protests. “Think about what everyone would say!”

“I can retire for whatever reason I want,” Vitya insists. “If I can’t tell you not to retire, then you can’t tell me—“

The loud clatter of an empty bowl hitting the table interrupts the conversation.

“Nobody is retiring right now!” Victor says with the falsest cheer Vitya has ever seen in his life. “And we’re all going to the rink tomorrow to practice!”

“Victor… Did you tell Yakov about, um, our guests?” Yuuri asks, nervously fiddling with the fork in his hand.

“No, I just told him we needed the rink to ourselves,” Victor explains. “He said it was fine.”

“There is no way he said it was _fine,_ ” Yuuri argues.

Vitya has to agree. That doesn’t sound like Yakov at all.

Victor shrugs.

“I told him it was for you, Yuuri, and he loves you!”

“He’s going to start hating me if you keep using me as an excuse,” Yuuri mutters.

“Don’t worry, Yuuri! You’re his favorite student and you’re not even his student,” Victor assures him. “Besides, what else could I do? Even if we explain why they’re here, Yuuri-chan probably doesn’t want to skate in front of the others, right?”

Yuuri-chan shakes his head quickly.

“Um, please don’t burden yourselves because of me,” he says. “I don’t want you to waste your time.”

Victor frowns, pulling his fiancé closer to him.

“Your time is just as important as everyone else’s,” he says, and Vitya isn’t entirely sure which Yuuri he wanted to direct it to. Perhaps it was meant for both of them.

Yuuri-chan nods shyly but doesn’t meet anyone’s gaze. Yuuri, on the other hand, locks eyes with Victor, and neither seems likely to look away any time soon.

So Vitya supposes it’s up to him to get the conversation going again.

“Well, I want to master the quad flip before I go back,” he says loudly. “I’m going to land it at the next Grand Prix Final and take gold in my senior debut,” he adds.

Yuuri-chan gasps.

“You… You mean you haven’t got the quad flip down yet?” he asks in shock.

“I take it I do by your time,” Vitya responds, smirking.

Yuuri-chan nods dazedly.

“It’s your signature move,” he explains. “It’s hard to imagine you having to _practice_ it.”

Vitya isn’t sure how he feels about the way Yuuri-chan is looking at him. He’s never been self-conscious before, but it suddenly feels like he _should_ be able to do the quad flip already, like maybe he’ll only _really_ be Victor Nikiforov when he can.

He fights back the urge to scowl.

“I wasn’t born knowing how to skate, you know,” he says, feeling the need to defend himself for some reason.

“I know,” Yuuri-chan says, still looking awestruck. “But I think… this might be the first time I’ve thought about it…”

And Vitya feels like they’ve now bared a bit too much of their souls at this point, so he quickly changes the subject.

“So, Yuuri-chan, what are you going to show me?” he asks with a grin.

“W-What?” Yuuri-chan stutters out in surprise.

“I’m going to show you my quad flip. What are you going to show me?” Vitya repeats.

“I can’t… I can’t do any quads…” Yuuri-chan says in what he apparently thinks is a proper response to that question.

Yuuri, who was perfectly content letting the teenagers talk amongst themselves, apparently finds _now_ to be the best time to jump into the conversation.

“You… were working on the quad toe loop, weren’t you?” he asks Yuuri-chan, narrowing his eyes as if it would help him remember. “Because… I thought… that’s right…” 

Yuuri and Yuuri-chan’s faces look exactly the same, slightly contorted and flushed in embarrassment.

“I wanted to land at least one quad before I retired,” Yuuri says after a moment of awkward silence. 

Yuuri-chan looks mortified.

“Why would you say it out loud like that?” he asks, so quietly that it’s almost a whisper.

“Because it’s okay to admit that you want something,” Yuuri replies, his jaw clenched. He says the words like he finds them hard to believe, but the sounds roll off his tongue as though he’s practiced them many times before.

Nobody says anything, so Yuuri continues.

“And eventually I did master the quad toe. I won a competition with it, and that’s when I officially decided to continue skating.”

“Oh…” Yuuri-chan says after a moment. “Congratulations.”

Vitya rolls his eyes.

“Okay, so you’re going to practice the quad toe, and I’ll practice the quad flip,” he says with finality. 

“I…” Yuuri-chan starts, but then he looks at Vitya, and though he flushes, there’s a determination in his eyes that leaves a pleasant sense of satisfaction curling in Vitya’s mind.

“Yeah, okay.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at me, managing to get another chapter out this weekend! See, this is going to kill me when I have to write essays because... I'm not going to have any excuse... Like, I have a 1000-2000 ish (I think) word essay due on February 2... and this fic is already longer than that, and... what about that one 15k word fic I wrote in 5 days, or the almost 20k word one that I wrote in a week... I just have no excuse for not being able to write for school, other than "I LOVE victuri and I don't care about [insert prominent psychologist/political/scientist/philosopher here]."
> 
> Although... we're also reading Jean-Jacques Rousseau, and... I imagined the picture of him on the cover doing the "JJ Style" pose, and that... made me feel a little happier, haha. I mean, I smiled. You gotta take what humor you can get in this world.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you like this chapter! I think it'd be pretty weird to have to argue with your younger self. Like, I imagined if I ever met a younger me, and... there's just so much I KNOW NOW, so I'd totally want to control her, like... trust me, I know what I'm doing here!!! But also, I know my younger self would NOT appreciate being told what to do. My present-day self hates being told what to do, too.

There’s one small problem when everyone wants to go to bed, and it’s that there just isn’t enough sleeping space for four people. Yuuri and Victor have their bed, of course, and one person can take the couch, but someone’s going to have to make do with a nest of blankets and the floor.

“Vitya will take the floor,” Victor volunteers before anyone else can speak.

And the thing is, Vitya wouldn’t even mind the floor that much. No, what he minds is his older self just _making the decision for him._

“Excuse me!” Vitya exclaims. “I just won gold in Worlds! I think I deserve better than the floor!”

“I can sleep on the floor,” Yuuri-chan offers, but nobody responds.

“Wow! One gold medal in the _Junior_ World Championships,” Victor says sarcastically. “Listen, Vitya, I know what I’m doing. When you buy an apartment, you can decide who sleeps on the floor.”

Next to Victor, Yuuri is holding his head in his hands.

“Victor, please. You and VItya can share the bed. Yuuri-chan can have the couch, and I’ll take the floor,” he offers.

Victor shakes his head vehemently.

“Yuuri! I can’t let you sleep on the floor in our own home! You and Yuuri-chan can have the bed, I’ll take the couch, and Vitya can take the floor.”

Vitya glares at Victor.

“Or maybe Yuuri-chan and I can have the bed because we’re guests, Yuuri can take the couch, and you can sleep on _your_ floor in _your_ apartment.”

“I really don’t mind the floor,” Yuuri-chan chimes in again.

“Nobody named Yuuri is sleeping on the floor,” Victor says firmly, leaving no room for argument.

“I’ll sleep on the couch and Victor can sleep on the floor,” Vitya offers through clenched teeth.

“Fine,” Victor agrees, teeth also clenched.

“It’s not fine!” Yuuri-chan exclaims. 

Vitya shifts his gaze towards him in surprise.

“I don’t want to share a bed with Yuuri! That’s weird anyway, and it’s weird because it’s your bed a-and you two are…” He trails off with a blush.

And now Vitya just feels like a bad person. Maybe _this_ was why his fellow skaters don’t like him.

“I’m sorry, Yuuri-chan,” Vitya says, faking a laugh. “If you want the couch I don’t really mind taking the floor.”

Victor’s eyes narrow at him.

Yuuri-chan looks at Vitya worriedly.

“Oh, no, no, no! I can take the floor. It might hurt your back if you sleep at a bad angle or something,” he says, waving his arms around.

Shit. Vitya should really have seen this coming. _Victor_ had probably seen it coming, and… Shit.

“I just won gold. I’m in the best shape of my life. This won’t hurt me,” Vitya says, sitting down on the floor. For good measure, he stretches out.

“Mine now,” he says, grinning to cover up a grimace.

_’God, you’d think I’d invest in some carpeting,’_ he inwardly complains, while outwardly pretending that the hardwood floor feels just great.

“We’ll buy another couch first thing tomorrow,” Yuuri says worriedly as he drags out every spare blanket and pillow in the entire apartment.

“And then we’ll skate?” Vitya presses.

“Right. Of course,” Yuuri agrees.

* * *

With several pillows and blankets cushioning him, the floor really isn’t _that_ bad.

But it’s not that great, either, and no matter how he orients himself, Vitya can’t seem to find a position that will allow him to fall asleep.

Across the room, Yuuri-chan rests silently on the couch. With nothing else to do, Vitya studies him.

Yuuri-chan doesn’t look very comfortable. His body is rigid, and his arms lie across his chest, his fingers curled into fists.

Vitya isn’t sure why, but he has to get closer. As quietly as he can, he approaches the arm of the couch where Yuuri-chan is resting his head.

Now that Vitya is right next to him, he can see that Yuuri-chan’s mouth is twisted slightly downward.

_’How can he sleep like this?’_ Vitya wonders.

Well, apparently he actually can’t, because his mouth opens up.

“Vitya,” he whispers. “How long are you going to stand there?”

Vitya stumbles backwards a bit in surprise, covering his mouth with his hand to avoid making any loud sounds that might wake the adults.

Yuuri-chan’s eyes open, and they shine with humor. His lips quirk up into the smallest of smiles, and then he sits up.

“Were you wanting to trade places?” Yuuri-chan continues. “Victor doesn’t have to know.”

Vitya shakes his head quickly.

“It’s not that,” he says.

The problem is, he’s not sure what it was. But Yuuri-chan seems to draw his own conclusions.

“I knew the floor wouldn’t be comfortable,” Yuuri-chan says. “I don’t mind trading. It’s not like I’m going to be able to sleep anyway.”

“Are you planning to stay awake?” Vitya asks, frowning in confusion.

Yuuri-chan shakes his head.

“I always have trouble sleeping in new places,” he explains. 

Vitya thinks about all the times he’s had to sleep on various beds, couches, and even chairs sometimes when he travels for competitions. Sleeping comes naturally to him just about anywhere.

“Isn’t that a problem for you?” he asks. “What do you do when you have to skate the next day?”

Yuuri-chan looks down at his lap.

“It… It doesn’t always… It’s really only when I start overthinking that I…” Yuuri-chan tries to explain. “That is… yes. It’s a problem,” he finally says with a heavy sigh.

“Oh.” 

Vitya isn’t sure what to say, and in fact, he already regrets asking the question. What had he expected Yuuri-chan to say to something like that? He hadn’t thought that far ahead, but now here he was, saying the wrong things like always.

And this is normally the part where whoever he’s talking to announces that they think he’s the biggest jerk in skating, if not the world, and they never want to hear from him again, Vitya is very used to this process.

Only… that isn’t what Yuuri-chan is doing. He isn’t saying anything at all, and he doesn’t even look offended. He’s just… sitting there, looking pensive.

So, without a clue of what he should do in this situation, Vitya just stares at him.

Eventually, Yuuri-chan seems to come back to himself, and he finally turns to Vitya.

“Sorry. Did you want to sit down?” he asks, shifting over to make more room.

“You don’t mind?” Vitya asks somewhat incredulously.

“I already told you I’m not going to sleep,” Yuuri-chan says with a shrug. “You might as well sit. I can move…”

“Just stay here, Yuuri-chan,” Vitya insists. “There’s room for us both as long as we’re just sitting.”

“Alright,” Yuuri-chan says. His voice is tired, and leans into the back of the couch as he closes his eyes. 

_’It’s not fair that he can’t sleep. He obviously needs it,’_ Vitya thinks.

He probably shouldn’t stare at Yuuri-chan… but the other teenager’s eyes are closed, so it’s not like he can see. Yuuri-chan keeps his features blank and his breathing controlled… but his body is still tense, and Vitya believes his word that he has no expectation of falling asleep.

Vitya, on the other hand, finds drowsiness overtaking him despite his desire to stay awake with Yuuri-chan. 

He can’t fight his exhaustion for very long, and soon he is lulled into slumber by the sound of Yuuri-chan’s rhythmic breathing.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, school is hard ;n;
> 
> Anyway, I hope you like this chapter! I actually wrote this last week, and this scene was supposed to only be ~400 words and I was going to add the next part to it, but... I don't know, I think it turned out alright like this. 
> 
> Also, who else thinks Victor could totally rock body glitter. I saw a post on tumblr the other day that was like "make 2017 the year we bring back body glitter" and this was after I had already written the chapter, but I was just like... YES
> 
> Please give me sparkly!Victor

When Vitya returns to consciousness, his arms are wrapped around something warm, but it’s strange, because whatever it is clearly too large to be his dog…

But it feels nice, so he nuzzles the object with his head and is just about to go back to sleep when the sound of voices reaches his ears.

“… took me _months,_ Yuuri! And he manages it in one night!” Victor says, half-whining.

“Maybe that’s because Vitya didn’t show up naked and frighten Yuuri-chan half to death in his family home,” Yuuri responds, chuckling.

Vitya’s eyes snap open as the memories of the previous day return to him.

And the sight of Yuuri in Victor’s arms might have ignited something in him, were it not for the sight of _Yuuri-chan_ in his _own_ arms.

_’Shit! But it doesn’t mean anything! I was unconscious!’_ he reminds himself.

And yet, part of him aches.

_’It would be nice to do this while I’m awake, though. Or when the other person is awake…’_

Yuuri-chan’s eyes are closed and his face is peaceful—or rather, that was the case before Vitya withdraws his arms and accidentally knocks Yuuri-chan off the couch in the process.

“Ow…” Yuuri-chan mutters quietly, blinking sleep from his eyes.

“Good morning!” Vitya exclaims cheerfully, like nothing’s wrong. “Looks like you managed to fall asleep after all, Yuuri-chan!” 

“Uh… I guess I did…” Yuuri-chan agrees, blushing slightly as he pulls himself back up onto the couch.

“Good,” Yuuri says softly. “I was worried about you. I know how it is.”

“Yeah,” Yuuri-chan mumbles, avoiding Yuuri’s gaze. But then he looks at Vitya, and he seems to become a little less despondent.

“Did you sleep alright, Vitya?” he asks, fidgeting a bit.

_’I wonder if he was still awake when I fell onto him,’_ Vitya thinks.

“Oh, yes,” Vitya says, smiling broadly. “I was very comfortable,” he continues with a wink.

Yuuri-chan nods, embarrassed.

“That’s… good,” he says, and then he smiles. “I was comfortable, too. “

And the _way_ Yuuri-chan looks at him is _not_ good for Vitya’s heart.

But before Vitya can say anything generally regrettable, Victor pipes up.

“Does that mean I don’t have to buy another couch?” he asks, laughing at the scandalized expressions both Yuuri and Yuuri-chan give him. 

“I’m kidding! “ Victor insists. “We’ve been thinking about getting another one for months now. Yuuri, love, do you remember if you liked the blue one or the white one better?”

“Blue,” Yuuri responds immediately. “Remember that time we spilled champagne, and I said it was a good thing we didn’t have a white couch, or the stain would never come out.”

“Oh, that’s right!” Victor says. He pulls Yuuri closer and rests his head against him. “How did I ever make decisions before you came around?” he murmurs tenderly.

And the sight makes Vitya angry with jealousy (… a feeling that’s becoming all too familiar to him). He doesn’t have a fiancé to help him make decisions! All he has is a grouchy coach.

And, well, alcohol, if he can get his hands on it. And he’s a famous athlete, so he usually can.

So maybe his decisions could be… _better,_ sometimes.

“I’m the one who’s going to be sleeping on this thing! Don’t I get a say?” he demands. He can hear the bitterness in his own voice, and he’s sure Victor can recognize it. He wonders if Yuuri can, too… or Yuuri-chan…

Victor leaves Yuuri’s side (and Vitya is shocked that he’s capable of it) and walks behind Vitya’s spot on the couch. He drapes his hands casually over Vitya’s shoulders.

“I remember my tastes at your age, so absolutely not!” Victor says, grinning.

Vitya’s face morphs into an expression of outrage.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asks, ripping Victor’s hands off of him.

“He didn’t mean it badly, Vitya,” Yuuri says soothingly. “Everyone regrets some of the stylistic choices of their teenage selves.”

This statement might have gone over better if Yuuri’s teenage self hadn’t also been in the room.

“What?” Yuuri-chan practically shrieks, a horrified look in his eyes. “Are you speaking from _experience?_ What am I doing wrong?”

Yuuri looks like a deer caught in the headlights for all of two seconds before he starts rapidly waving his arms.

“No, no, no, no, you’re fine, Yuuri-chan!” he says apologetically.

“What… do you regret about my stylistic choices, Yuuri…” Yuuri-chan says weakly, looking down at his clothing like he’s afraid he’s making the biggest fashion mistake of the century.

“Not _that_ much,” Yuuri responds, his voice sounding just as weak. “It’s… just…”

Victor, spurned by Vitya, now returns to Yuuri’s side.

“I’d think you were beautiful no matter what,” Victor says into Yuuri’s ear, apparently under the impression that it’s too quiet for Vitya and Yuuri-chan to hear.

Vitya glances at Yuuri-chan, but it’s impossible to tell his reaction because he still looks like he’s dying.

“Just tell me how it is, Yuuri,” Yuuri-chan pleads. “I just want to know.”

Yuuri sighs.

“Look, it’s just… You don’t need to copy _all_ of Victor’s ideas,” Yuuri admits.

“Um…” Yuuri-chan blushes.

“The black nail polish was alright,” Yuuri continues. “But the body glitter… Yuuri-chan, we can’t pull off body glitter.”

Yuuri-chan covers his face with his hands.

Victor, on the other hand, looks delighted.

“I remember! I only wore it for a performance once, because it was very hard to get off. Worlds was so fun that year!” he says cheerfully. Suddenly, his eyes widen, and his head snaps over to look at Yuuri. “Wait, you never told me about this! Please tell me you have pictures!”

Really, the only consolation for Yuuri-chan is that Yuuri actually looks _much_ more embarrassed.

“Of course I don’t!” Yuuri exclaims, covering his face just like Yuuri-chan. 

“Are you sure?” Victor asks, kissing part of Yuuri’s cheek that isn’t hidden. “Maybe we can recreate it,” he continues, kissing Yuuri lightly on the lips when Yuuri removes his hands.

“Victor, no!” Yuuri exclaims, but he smiles. And his smile is beautiful. 

_’Yuuri-chan is more like Yuuri than I’m like Victor,_ ” Vitya thinks, and it’s not a very nice feeling. The differences between him and Victor seem to stretch endlessly. He thinks he should be happy… after all, he’ll eventually _be_ this version of himself, so much better than he is now in every way. It’s so completely ridiculous to feel jealous of oneself, Vitya’s known this from the second he first felt it, but… He’s not this Victor now, and he wishes so desperately that he were, and it hurts.

He turns to Yuuri-chan sitting next to him, hands still covering his face, and even though VItya is not this Victor, he wants to make Yuuri-chan smile like his older self does with Yuuri. 

Only, he doesn’t exactly know how to.

With only the slightest bit of hesitation, he reaches out and touches Yuuri-chan’s shoulder.

“Don’t feel bad. Apparently the body glitter was my terrible idea,” he says.

Slowly, Yuuri-chan lowers his hands. He says nothing, his eyes searching Vitya for something.

Vitya smiles softly at him.

“I’ve always wanted to be a bad influence,” he says, and he’s rewarded with a light laugh from Yuuri-chan.

“Aren’t you already?” Yuuri-chan says, and, good, he smiles.

It’s not quite the same as the smile Yuuri gave, but it’s so close. And it’s beautiful too. Of course it is.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "What genre am I even writing?" I ask myself every time I write a new chapter.
> 
> Seriously, I feel like there's a lot happening in this chapter... the plot moves forward, a little bit, finally (lol, but don't get used to it) and of course I continue to explore Vitya's thoughts and feelings.
> 
> This is another one of those times when I wish I were writing Yuuri-chan's POV too, because... well, he definitely has a different perspective than Vitya here! Of course, a lot of Yuuri-chan's thoughts here are just "what" and "asdfghjkl" so... maybe it's better for the story that I'm NOT writing it.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

They don’t get to go to the rink until the evening, what with most of their day being spent buying furniture, and then assembling furniture, and then complaining about how hard it is to assemble furniture, and… Well, it took a while.

But that, apparently, was just perfect, because Victor assures them that the rink will be empty now, and they can skate without anyone judging their situation.

So they go, and it’s just the four of them in an otherwise empty rink, and it’s a little awkward at first.

But then Vitya gets tired of waiting and decides to just throw himself out there.

“Wait—“ Victor rushes to say, but Vitya’s already on the ice, the familiar setting soothing him.

 _’This is where I belong,’_ he thinks. 

On the ice, there’s no jealousy, no bitterness, no pain. He feels free.

Once he’s relaxed, he finds himself skating a familiar routine, the one that just won him a gold medal. There’s no music playing, but he’s had it memorized for ages; the notes ring in his head anyway.

He doesn’t bother doing his complex jumps, instead turning most of them to singles for the sake of not getting tired.

There’s only one jump he wants to do, anyway.

He sets up for a quadruple flip, and while he’s in the air, he thinks he might even pull it off.

But then he lands, and he can tell it’s wrong. He falls onto the ice. It doesn’t really hurt, and it he’d kind of expected it anyway, so he’s not even upset.

The fall knocks the breath out of him, but as soon as he catches it again, he lets out a good-humored laugh, waving to the three watching him.

Victor looks both amused and exasperated.

“I told you to wait!” Victor chastises lightly, but he’s not angry. Vitya’s used to regularly ignoring Yakov’s demands, and Victor is so much less intimidating…

“You’re too predictable,” Victor continues, pouting. 

Okay, _that_ gets Vitya’s attention. If there’s one thing he doesn’t want to be, it’s predictable…. _boring._

He exits the ice, then takes a seat next to Victor, crossing his arms.

“Explain,” he insists.

“I knew you were going to go and flub that jump from the second you stepped in here,” Victor tells him. “And then when you reduced the difficulty of your program, it was too obvious what you were planning. You didn’t even wait for a demonstration!”

Now it’s Vitya’s turn to pout.

Yuuri looks incredibly amused as he draws closer, putting a hand on both Victor’s and Vitya’s shoulder.

“What Victor actually means,” Yuuri says as he bites back laughter, “is that you stole his spotlight.”

“Your spotlight, actually,” Victor corrects. “Didn’t I tell you? I want you to coach Vitya on the quad flip.”

Yuuri gasps, and his hand leaves Vitya’s shoulder.

“What?”

“Oh, maybe I forgot,” Victor says, shrugging. “Anyway, think about it, Yuuri! I know how to coach you, so I should be able to coach Yuuri-chan, too. And you can do the quad flip as well as me, maybe a little better, since you can do it in the second half of a program.”

“But, I—“ Yuuri’s protests are cut off as Victor stands up and grabs Yuuri’s hands.

“ _Please._ I trust you with him,” Victor says, his voice so soft and serious that Vitya has to look away. “You can give him more than I ever could.”

Vitya isn’t sure exactly what Victor means, and yet he also knows that Victor must be right. He and Victor, despite being the same person, are somehow discordant. Yuuri and Yuuri-chan are harmonious, and Victor and Yuuri are perfectly synchronized to each other… Vitya doesn’t know what he and Yuuri are together, but it has to be better than the confusing, slightly uneasy relationship between Vitya and Victor.

“Vitya?” Yuuri’s voice snaps him out of the reverie he hadn’t realized he’d fallen into. “What do you think?”

Vitya laughs.

“This is why I like you better. You actually ask me what I think.”

“He likes you better, Yuuri,” Victor echoes cheerfully.

“Ah…” Yuuri’s cheeks flush slightly. “No, I mean, think about this seriously. I only recently learned the quad flip myself, and unlike Victor, I’ve never coached anyone before. Are you sure you don’t want him to teach you instead?”

Vitya shakes his head slightly.

“I like you, and you can do a quad flip. What’s the problem?” he responds.

“Well… if you’re sure…” Yuuri says, glancing between Vitya and Victor.

“I’m positive,” Vitya affirms.

It’s going to be different. Yuuri isn’t like Yakov. Vitya can’t (doesn’t want to) treat him the same way.

Besides, Yakov doesn’t like him. It’s understandable, because Vitya knows he puts the man through too much trouble. 

_”You’re going to send me to an early grave, Vitya!” Yakov had yelled at him once after having to rescue him from a brawl. He hadn’t meant to start it, but he’d been talking, talking **too much,** and somehow he’d said something wrong, unsurprisingly, but this time he’d said it to someone who was willing to fight. And it had been terrifying. Vitya, physically, was strong, but in an athletic way, built for skating rather than fighting. If Yakov hadn’t been there…_

_But he hadn’t even had the decency to thank him, or, for that matter, apologize._

_“You should have let me punch him,” he’d said instead. As if he could have done anything. As if he wouldn’t have been completely demolished in a fight._

_“If you weren’t the most promising skater in Russia, I would tell you to quit right now,” Yakov had replied, so cold and deadly serious. “You make one wrong move and your career is over before it begins. Don’t expect anyone to help you next time. You aren’t as special as you think you are.”_

_Vitya had, for once in his life, kept his mouth shut._

Not that it had stopped him from having to be saved by Yakov many more times (that apparently Yakov was alive and well and still coaching Victor in the future was a slight consolation, but also beside the point).

It isn’t as if VItya _enjoys_ tormenting his coach. There’s just a certain rhythm to how things happen. Vitya, craving independence, breaks off on his own. Vitya, never as ready as he thinks he is (or wants to be), screws up. Yakov, the only adult Vitya can actually turn to, fixes things. Even if he curses Vitya’s name the entire time, even if he hates VItya for what he’s done, he fixes things.

But that’s his relationship with Yakov. He wants something different (nicer) with Yuuri.

He doesn’t know how he can possibly express this desire.

Instead, he throws his arms around Yuuri.

“Teach me everything you know, coach!” he exclaims.

Yuuri laughs, and he isn’t bothered by Vitya having his hands on him. How nice.

“Meanwhile, I’ll teach everything I know to Yuuri-chan!” Victor adds.

Yuuri-chan, who had been content to stay out of the conversation, now splutters.

“I, um, what?” Yuuri-chan is adorable when he’s flustered.

“You want me to be your coach, don’t you?” Victor asks, and his lips twitch upward as if he’s remembered a joke. “Not to brag, but there are hundreds of articles written about how good I am at coaching Yuuri,” he says braggingly.

Vitya’s hands are, sadly, no longer wrapped around Yuuri, but he’s still close enough to hear the beginnings of a laugh that Yuuri immediately smothers.

“Are you really asking me that?” Yuuri-chan asks in disbelief. “Victor Nikiforov wants to coach me? I would never say no to that!”

“Great! So the first thing I want you to do is skate for us like Vitya did. Do you want music? I have a playlist of all of the songs Yuuri has ever used so I probably have whatever you were working with.”

“You do?” Yuuri and Yuuri-chan ask in unison, glancing at each other in surprise.

“Why are you surprised, Yuuri? You have one with all of my music. I told you I liked the idea,” Victor says, beaming at his fiancé.

“I thought you liked the idea of having _your_ music in a playlist,” Yuuri admits.

“What kind of coach would I be if I didn’t have yours, too?”

And so Yuuri-chan tells Victor the music he wants, and then Victor and Yuuri go off together to set something up, and thus Vitya and Yuuri-chan are left alone.

Vitya looks at Yuuri-chan, but Yuuri-chan isn’t looking back. Rather, he’s staring at the rink, a dreamy look on his face.

“He’s _coaching_ me. This is the best dream I’ve ever had,” Yuuri-chan murmurs to himself.

And Yuuri-chan looks _so_ adorable with his wide, sparkly eyes and his joyous smile and his hand over his heart like he’s feeling it beat for the first time, and… 

And Vitya feels jealous of Victor, again.

Is it wrong that he wants Yuuri-chan to like _him_ over Victor?

But he doesn’t know what to do with this feeling, and Yuuri-chan’s not even looking at him at the moment.

“Oops,” he says, pretending to trip as he walks toward Yuuri-chan.

Nobody’s ever accused him of being _mature._

“Oh! Vitya! Are you okay?” Yuuri-chan asks worriedly.

“I’m fine,” Vitya assures him, because it wasn’t like he was going to let himself get hurt in his fake fall. “Just wasn’t paying attention.”

Yuuri-chan frowns, which isn’t the response Vitya wanted to elicit at all.

“Can you help me up?” he hurries to say, reaching out a hand.

“Oh! Oh, uh, of course,” Yuuri-chan agrees, putting his hand in Vitya’s and pulling.

“Thank you,” Vitya says, looking into Yuuri-chan’s eyes. 

Vitya _likes_ having Yuuri-chan’s full attention.

Yuuri-chan smiles hesitantly at him, and VItya’s heart swells.

And he has to laugh.

“W-What is it? Are you sure you’re okay?” Yuuri-chan asks in concern, which only makes Vitya laugh more.

But he can’t really explain it.

“It’s just funny. I’m not normally this clumsy,” Vitya says when he finally stops laughing.

“I know,” Yuuri-chan replies, then his eyes widen as he realizes what he’s said. “Wait, no, I didn’t mean to suggest that you’re clumsy! I, uh, I meant, you’re not clumsy, you’re just, uh, unbalanced…“

“Oh, Yuuri-chan,” Vitya sighs in mock hurt. “You must think I have no grace! How will my reputation ever recover?” 

“No, no! You’re very graceful! The most graceful!”

“Catch me, Yuuri-chan! I’m too out of balance to stand!” he continues, tipping backwards slightly.

Surprisingly, he feels Yuuri-chan’s arms wrap around him.

“V-Vitya!”

Vitya hadn’t actually thought that Yuuri-chan was going to do anything. His cheeks flush slightly.

“I wasn’t really going to fall,” Vitya says weakly.

“That’s not what it looked like…” Yuuri-chan mutters. “Come on, let’s sit down until Victor and Yuuri come back.”

Vitya laughs, but obliges.

They sit in comfortable silence for a minute before they realize something.

“Are… Victor and Yuuri… okay?” Yuuri-chan asks in confusion.

“They’ve been gone for a while,” Vitya agrees.

But two minutes later, they get an idea of what happened when a very flustered Yuuri runs over, waving his arms.

“Technical difficulties!” Yuuri yells. “Victor’s almost done fixing it.”

A moment later, Victor comes over, equally flustered, his hair not quite perfectly in place.

“Everything’s great! The music works great!”

 _’Technical difficulties. Sure.’_ Vitya thinks, smirking as he exchanges glances with a red-faced Yuuri-chan.

“Are you ready, Yuuri-chan?” Victor asks. He rests his elbow on Yuuri’s shoulder, and Vitya almost laughs. “Just do whatever jumps you feel like. That’s what Vitya did.”

Vitya rolls his eyes.

“Um… right…” Yuuri-chan mumbles distractedly. Before he can make his way onto the ice, Vitya runs over to him.

“Good luck, Yuuri-chan!” he says encouragingly, putting an arm around Yuuri-chan’s shoulders.

“Um…” Yuuri-chan hesitates. “Thank you. I’ll… do my best…” he responds.

Vitya nods, and then Yuuri-chan is off, skating into the center of the ice and warming up a bit.

Vitya watches him a bit, but he also keeps an eye on Victor and Yuuri. They’re whispering to each other, but Vitya isn’t close enough to make out what they’re saying.

That’s fine, because as soon as the music starts, Vitya is completely enraptured by Yuuri-chan, anyway.

It’s immediately obvious that whatever problems Yuuri-chan has are technical in nature, because there’s no way he could have a presentation problem. 

He’s inspiring. He’s captivating. He’s…

“Beautiful,” Vitya breathes aloud.

In truth, Vitya isn’t actually paying attention to _what_ Yuuri-chan is doing. He could be breaking every rule the ISU had ever made, and Vitya wouldn’t even know. It’s _how_ Yuuri-chan is skating that has his attention.

“Do you understand why he can’t quit now?” Victor’s voice beside him surprises him; Vitya hadn’t realized he’d moved.

But as far as the question goes, he does understand.

“If he quits I think I’ll die,” Vitya says, placing a hand on his chest. “What are you supposed to be teaching him, again?”

“Quad toe.”

“Oh, yeah…” Vitya says distractedly. Yuuri’s finished with his routine now, and Victor starts to skate out to meet him.

But first, he says something that Vitya really could have gone without hearing.

“He’ll pick it up quickly. Yuuri has more dedication than anybody else. He’s always worked harder than I ever have.”

 _’What the hell does he mean by that?’_ Vitya thinks, more hurt than he’d like to admit by the implication that somehow he isn’t working hard enough.

And he just can’t stop thinking about it.

He thinks about it when they leave the rink. He thinks about it when they get back to the apartment. He thinks about it when he lays on the new couch, comfortable yet strange in its unfamiliarity. 

And he thinks about it even as he drifts into unconsciousness.

_’He’s always worked harder than I ever have. Am I undeserving, then?’_


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter... sure is long for something that has very little plot progression...
> 
> But there is character progression (or, at least, there's SUPPOSED to be, if I wrote it correctly), so I hope you'll enjoy the chapter anyway ^u^

Vitya grits his teeth as his skates scrape the ice.

_’Wrong. All wrong.’_

“Are you feeling alright, Vitya? We’ve been at this for a while; do you want to take a break?” Yuuri asks, gazing at him with concern.

“Fine,” Vitya mutters, not sure which question he’s answering.

It’s not so much that he’s tired. Although his body feels slightly fatigued, it’s really nothing. Yakov would make him go much harder for much longer. Normally, Vitya would only take so many breaks if he were injured. But he’s not injured (is he?), so he doesn’t know why he’s being like this.

“I’m sorry. I know I’m not explaining very well…” Yuuri apologizes.

Vitya burns with guilt.

They’ve been practicing for a week now, and Vitya is… certainly not acting like the skating prodigy the world proclaims him to be.

And Yuuri seems to think it’s his fault. 

But of course, Vitya knows it’s all his own responsibility.

“You’re the best coach I’ve ever had, Yuuri,” Vitya tells him. It’s not the first time he’s expressed this sentiment, and just like the previous times, Yuuri waves the statement off.

“You don’t have to say that, Vitya. I know I’ve got nothing on Yakov. He always gives excellent advice, even though he speaks so quickly that it’s hard to catch it all…”

The last statement is made more to himself than to Vitya. Vitya lets out a snicker.

“Okay, Yakov knows more than you,” Vitya concedes, because it’s the undeniable truth. “But I still like you better. It’s not your fault that I’m…”

What is he? Bitter? Irritable? Running on talent alone (doomed when it runs out)? Nothing compared to Victor (or Yuuri, either)?

“Tired,” he finishes.

“Tired…” Yuuri repeats. Vitya doesn’t think he believes him. But then something changes in his expression, and Vitya finds himself being pressed to Yuuri’s chest. “Oh, Vitya, of course you’re tired. You woke up in this time right after a competition. You probably need a vacation.”

Vitya doesn’t know how to tell him that a vacation is the exact opposite of what he needs at the moment. He doesn’t know how to say what’s really upsetting him, and he certainly doesn’t know how to explain it to _Yuuri,_ who would probably just blame himself even though it’s not his fault Victor values Yuuri and Yuuri-chan over himself, Vitya, and probably everyone else in the world.

Vitya feels Yuuri’s hand brush the top of his head, and it’s only then that he realizes he’s clutching onto Yuuri.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Vitya,” Yuuri asks softly, pleadingly.

Vitya blushes, but his face, hidden in Yuuri’s chest (where it’s comfortable) isn’t visible.

He can’t tell him the whole truth, but…

“I don’t need a vacation. I don’t really do vacations.”

Yuuri is quiet for a few seconds before he speaks again.

“Everyone needs to take time off sometimes,” Yuuri says gently. “You’ll find out soon. Your annual vacations become the talk of the figure skating community for years. Would you believe me if I said that you and Chris are going to go on a European road trip so wild it becomes an urban legend in several cities?” he asks.

There are several things to process in what Yuuri has just said. One, he starts taking annual vacations. Two, they’re apparently wild, which he supposes explains why Victor thinks he could have worked harder… (The real question is why Yakov allowed this… although Vitya imagines his coach probably did attempt to stop him… is it okay to feel guilty about something that hasn’t happened yet?)

But he decides to comment only on one thing.

“I… don’t know who Chris is…” Vitya admits with confusion, taking a couple of steps back so he can look at Yuuri.

“Oh?” Yuuri looks surprised at that. “I guess you haven’t met him in your time. Uh, I can show you some pictures… Better look at Victor’s account, though… Here.”

Yuuri hands him his phone. The picture on the screen shows Victor and a blond-haired man sitting by a pool.

 _’So I guess this means I’m not totally alone before I meet Yuuri.’_ Vitya thinks in slight wonder. It’s good to know, because that had sort of been what he’d assumed. It wasn’t as though Victor had a line of friends trying to talk to him all the time. Of course, Victor hardly ever takes his eyes away from Yuuri, but Vitya _had_ wondered if Victor even… _knew_ any other people, besides the other Russian skaters, of course.

“You can keep looking at that if you want,” Yuuri says, smiling. “I’m going to talk to Victor. I’ll be right back.”

“Alright.”

Vitya swipes the screen, revealing a new picture of Victor. The Chris fellow isn’t in this one, but Yuuri is. The caption reveals that they were in Barcelona for the Grand Prix Final. Victor’s arm is wrapped around Yuuri, and they’re both smiling.

Vitya swipes again. 

The next several pictures are of Yuuri, alone. They all have about 100 hearts in the captions. He hurries past them.

Eventually, he gets all the way to the first picture Victor took in Japan. After that, the pictures become… sort of boring. A lot of advertisements for his performances. Several pictures of him in his skating costumes at various angles. Some pretty landscapes. There are a few more pictures with Chris, which are the only ones where Victor’s smiles look genuine, but even in these his eyes seem dull somehow.

It’s like he wasn’t really living until he met Yuuri.

Vitya frowns, and quickly goes back to happier pictures.

It’s hard to tell from the pictures just when Yuuri and Victor became an official couple, because _every_ picture that they’re in together makes it look like they’re in love. Based on the captions, Vitya can only say that it was probably sometime around the time Yuuri competed in the Cup of China.

At the very least, it was _definitely_ before he competed in the Rostelecom Cup. Vitya taps one of the pictures to get a closer look.

“The love of my life is going to the Grand Prix Final!” the caption reads. The picture shows Yuuri, still in his skating costume, entwining his fingers with Victor’s. 

It’s funny, because Victor looks happier there than Vitya thinks _he_ looked when he qualified for the Grand Prix Final.

It makes him think.

Vitya has always thought that the love of his life was figure skating. But if it’s not, if Yuuri’s his love, then…

What’s he skating for?

He still feels the pride of gold coil inside him every time he thinks about winning. But he doesn’t think the love of winning alone can last him another 11 years.

He could probably just ask Victor, if he wanted to. But he doesn’t want to. This feels like the kind of thing he needs to come up with on his own.

“They look really happy in that picture,” Yuuri-chan’s voice startles Vitya out of his thoughts.

“Oh. Yeah, they do,” Vitya agrees, glancing at the phone again before turning to look at Yuuri-chan sitting next to him. “Did… Did Yuuri ask you to come over here?” he asks, because truthfully he had been expecting Yuuri to interrupt him, not Yuuri-chan.

“No. He asked Victor to go off and talk with him. Victor said I should take a break, but… I felt too guilty until I realized you were taking a break, too,” Yuuri-chan explains.

“You felt guilty doing what Victor told you to?”

“N-No! That’s not it! I… It’s just that I shouldn’t be wasting any time. I’m not doing very well even though Victor is doing his best.”

Vitya snorts.

“I bet that’s not true. It’s probably Victor’s fault. Yuuri blames himself for everything I do wrong, too,” Vitya argues.

“What could you possibly be doing wrong?” Yuuri-chan mumbles under his breath, but Vitya still hears it.

“Like, everything. I haven’t landed the jump once since I’ve been here. That’s even worse than before!” Vitya complains.

“At least your jump is hard! The quad toe loop is the easiest quad I could do, and I haven’t landed it once, either!” Yuuri exclaims in frustration.

Vitya doesn’t know what to say to that. Even he can tell that every response he can think of could be considered offensive, and Vitya doesn’t want to hurt Yuuri-chan. 

It’s a new feeling to him. He’s never cared about hurting others with his words before. And it’s uncomfortable, really, restraining himself like this. Normally he would open his mouth and let loose whatever he could think of ( _’Quad toe loops **are** easy. I could do them at 14.’_ he thinks, but that would obviously be insulting. _’Look, it’s not as hard as you believe. Just let me show you.’_ he thinks, but that would be like rubbing his skills in Yuuri-chan’s face), but he can’t do that now. Being tactful is so hard.

“At least you’re not showing me up, Yuuri-chan,” Vitya decides to say. 

The thing is, Vitya really does feel a bit relieved that Yuuri-chan isn’t picking up his quad very quickly. Because if he took to it naturally, Vitya would feel worse about falling into whatever pit he’s in at the moment.

It’s not a very kind thing to feel, and of course Vitya wants Yuuri-chan to succeed eventually! He’ll land it beautifully once he gets it, Vitya knows.

But, well, it’d be _nice_ if VItya could master his jump first. 

Yuuri-chan is looking at him strangely, and for a moment Vitya worries that he may have offended him anyway (despite his best efforts! He really _had_ tried this time!), but then Yuuri-chan shakes his head.

“That was a joke, right? You almost sounded serious,” Yuuri-chan says with a chuckle. “Me, showing _you,_ a gold medalist, up. That would be something to see.”

“You say that like you think it’s out of the question. What if I’ve peaked, Yuuri-chan? What if I never win another medal again?” Vitya asks, holding his hands dramatically to his chest.

He’s joking, but… He’s seen it happen to other skaters. He refuses to let himself go the same way, but there’s always the possibility…

“Vitya, you’re only going up,” Yuuri-chan says, laughing lightly. “Or did you miss Victor’s trophy room?”

“Hmm, I don’t know. He could have bought those online,” Vitya suggests, laughing as well. 

They fall silent, then. Yuuri-chan looks like he’s thinking deeply, so Vitya lets him be. Eventually, Yuuri-chan speaks up.

“Vitya…” his voice is hesitant.

“Yes?” Vitya replies when Yuuri-chan doesn’t go on.

“Do you… Do you really believe that this is our future?” Yuuri-chan asks quietly, staring at his hands in his lap. 

“Yes,” Vitya says firmly.

He didn’t realize that Yuuri-chan was still thinking about this. He thought the matter had been settled, really.

“But how can you be so sure? I-I mean, I know you can go on to win all those competitions like Victor, but… But I don’t think I can get to where Yuuri is. He’s teaching you the quad flip because he can _do_ a quad flip! I don’t think I can ever get there, and I… I don’t want to disappoint any of you, but maybe you shouldn’t get your hopes up about me. I don’t think this is my future,” Yuuri-chan says. He sounds sad, like…

“But you want it to be your future.”

Yuuri-chan hesitates again.

“Mm…”

Vitya crosses his arms.

“That’s not a response. Do you or don’t you?”

“I… do…” Yuuri-chan admits. “But… that doesn’t mean it will be…”

Vitya frowns.

“Yuuri-chan, why do you think the universe brought us together? Maybe this future isn’t guaranteed to happen, but it must be a possibility,” Vitya insists. “But if you give up, then what happens to me?”

The thought hurts him. He doesn’t want to spend his life faking smiles when he can have something better. Maybe he needs to show Yuuri-chan the pictures. Then he’d understand…

Only, before Vitya can bring up the pictures, he realizes that Yuuri-chan’s face is a bit… wetter… than it should be.

“Don’t tell me that,” Yuuri-chan says, his voice breaking. Tears stream down his face, but he doesn’t bother to wipe them, instead digging his fingers into his legs.

Vitya freezes. This was not the plan.

“If I mess up, if I _ever_ mess up, it will ruin everything! It was fine when it was just me, but now, now it’s going to affect you too! I can’t—“

Yuuri-chan breaks off abruptly, and Vitya still doesn’t know what to do. Now would be a _great_ time for Victor and Yuuri to come back, because Vitya could really use an adult right about now, but that doesn’t happen.

Nobody ever cries in front of Vitya. Even when he says hurtful things, he’s usually met with anger. Not sadness and guilt. 

It’s not fair. Vitya was really trying to be a good person this time. He didn’t want to hurt Yuuri-chan. Why did this happen anyway?

“I-I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad!” Vitya says, stuttering a bit. “Don’t… Don’t get so upset. If you hate skating so much, then… don’t do it for my sake. I’ll live.”

Except he really won’t, but obviously telling Yuuri-chan that is obviously no longer a good idea.

“I never said I hate skating!” Yuuri-chan protests emphatically, though still not quite _angrily._ “I love skating! It’s my whole life… I want to keep skating forever, but… if I can’t get better…” Yuuri-chan’s voice trails off in frustration.

“You will! That’s how practice works!” Vitya tries to encourage him.

“You don’t get it! You’re a skating prodigy and you can do anything that you set your mind to. It’s different for me. No matter how hard I try, I still might not be able to make it… Who wants to watch a second-rate skater? It doesn’t matter how much I still want to skate if I just disappoint everyone.”

Yuuri-chan’s face is still streaked with tears, and VItya wishes he could make him feel better. He thinks back to when Victor consoled him the day he arrived, and he thinks back to earlier when Yuuri comforted him. Vitya may be horrible with emotions, but he does have a physical presence. Maybe it will help.

“Yuuri-chan, please don’t think like that,” Vitya says, wrapping his arms around him. “I don’t think you’re second rate at all. I want to keep watching you.”

Yuuri-chan stiffens at the contact, but he makes no attempt to move away.

“I think your skating is beautiful. You believe me, don’t you? I’m a skating prodigy so I know what I’m talking about,” Vitya says warmly.

Yuuri-chan’s breath hitches in what Vitya likes to think is a laugh, and his body relaxes.

Vitya hugs him tighter.

“Listen… Yuuri-chan…” Vitya starts, swallowing thickly. He has to be more careful. He has to say it right this time. “It’s true that I don’t really understand what you’re feeling…”

His time in the future has made him experience many new emotions, but the fear of mediocrity has not been one of them. No matter what happens to him, he’ll always have the memory of being on top of the podium to guide him.

“… But, I just think that you should keep skating if you like it. You’re so amazing… captivating… breathtaking…”

“Vitya…” Yuuri-chan shifts slightly to look up at him. His eyes are still red, but they’re no longer brimming with tears. They are, however, shining with some different emotion.

If VItya wasn’t already blushing, he’d blush.

“W-What do you think about when you’re skating?” he asks quickly.

“Uh…” Yuuri-chan shrugs as well as he can with Vitya’s arms still around him. “The… the audience, I guess. I’d like the audience to be able to feel emotion through my programs…”

“Oh.” Vitya smiles. “I think it works.”

“You really think so?” Yuuri-chan asks hesitantly. “I… I’ve always tried… to move people like you do.”

“Like me…” Vitya murmurs.

Right. Neither Yuuri-chan nor Yuuri have ever hidden their admiration for his skating, but Vitya still forgets that he’s… he’s an inspiration to them. And other people, too. That’s what he always wanted, right? For everyone to see and admire him? Or…

“To move people, huh? Is that what I’m skating for?”

He imagines a packed audience, all gasping at his moves, their eyes shocked and delighted.

He thinks of Yuuri-chan wearing the same expression, and warmth curls inside him.

“Of course.”

He thinks he can sustain a career on something like this. The desire to show the audience new and beautiful sentiments with every performance. That _is_ something he wants.

“It makes sense now,” he breathes, closing his eyes. Even though he had originally hugged Yuuri-chan for Yuuri-chan’s sake, Vitya finds now that he’s the one who needs support. He lets his head fall onto Yuuri-chan’s shoulder.

“W-What?” Yuuri-chan asks, confused at Vitya’s thought process. His hands, which he’d been keeping to himself until this point, move to support Vitya in his new position.

“Nothing. You just answered a question I’ve been thinking about for a while,” Vitya responds, his voice overflowing with affection.

Vitya’s stays in that position, his eyes remaining closed, until he hears Victor and Yuuri approach.

His eyes snap open, then, and he glares at them. 

_’Where the hell were you when he was crying?’_ he thinks accusatorily, even though they don’t know about that. After a second, he drops his glare, because he can’t really explain it to them. He’s not going to tell them anything that Yuuri-chan doesn’t.

Yuuri-chan’s hands are no longer on him, and he seems to be trying to slide his way out of Vitya’s arms, so Vitya takes the hint and releases him, using his hands to wave to Yuuri and Victor instead.

“What took you so long?” Vitya asks cheerfully. “I had an existential crisis, and a resolution all in the time you were away.”

“Wow!” Victor exclaims with a laugh. “Did you get it all out of your system? You can’t have an existential crisis on our vacation, okay?”

“Wait, are we actually doing that?” Vitya asks incredulously.

“I told Yuuri we should go back to Hasetsu, but he vetoed that idea, which is a shame because there’s this _great_ waterfall that—“

“You’ll thank me later,” Yuuri tells Vitya and Yuuri-chan, cutting Victor off. “You two don’t need the waterfall.”

“I love that waterfall,” Victor says, sighing deeply. “But alas, Yuuri made the unfortunately correct point that we can’t exactly travel outside the country with two people who aren’t supposed to be in this time.”

“Clearly,” Vitya mutters.

“And for some reason he rejected my Russian road trip—“

“Because it involved vodka,” Yuuri explains.

“Wow. You’re setting such an awful example for me, Victor,” Vitya says in mock outrage.

“The vodka was only for me!” Victor protests.

“Victor, you’d be the one driving! I don’t know enough Russian to read the road signs.” Yuuri reminds him.

“Also unfortunate,” Victor says, wrapping his arm around Yuuri.

“Anyway,” Yuuri continues, leaning into Victors touch, “we decided that staying in Saint Petersburg would be the best. But we’ll all just agree to take it easy for a few days and not skate.”

Vitya’s a little disappointed, because now that he’s talked with Yuuri-chan, he feels more motivated to skate than ever. But he can’t protest, because if he practices, then Yuuri-chan would feel guilty if he didn’t, and Vitya wants Yuuri-chan to have a break.

“I can show you the city, Yuuri-chan,” Vitya offers. “You’ve never been here, have you?”

“Uh, no,” Yuuri-chan says. “I mean, no, I’ve never been. Yes, I’d like it if you showed me.”

Victor scoffs.

“You can’t show him around. The city’s changed since your time. You’ll get lost,” he points out.

“The important landmarks are still here!” Vitya protests. “Besides, if we go out, you and Yuuri can have the apartment to yourself.”

Victor is silent for a second. His eyes bore into Vitya before softening. Then, with a single blink of his eyes, his gentle expression is replaced with an overdramatic grin.

“Have fun! Take my phone and don’t talk to strangers!”

“Victor! We can’t let them go off on their own!” Yuuri says in horror.

“Let’s all talk about it more tomorrow,” Victor says. “It’s getting late.”

So they go home and rest.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember how I mentioned "I intend fluff eventually" in the tags on this fic? Well, here's a whole chapter full of fluff, so I hope you enjoy it! (I certainly need some fluff in my life right now... midterms are coming up soon for me and I mean 2 weeks sounds like a lot of time to prepare but it really is not... I'm not ready TnT)

It’s really not that hard to convince Yuuri and Victor to let them go off alone. It’s obvious that Yuuri trusts his younger self, and he doesn’t seem to mistrust Vitya either. He’s more concerned with the idea that he might be a horrible person for letting two teenagers explore the city alone, but then Vitya points out that he’s _always_ going off alone, and his eyes get all sad in a way that Vitya hates, but he relents.

Of course, Victor should probably know better, but Vitya figures he must really, really want to be alone with Yuuri.

He still gives Vitya a lecture.

“Do not go to any clubs. You don’t have that fake ID with you in this time, thank goodness, but you’d still better not try anything. Don’t get into any fights. You know what; just don’t talk to anyone. Except Yuuri-chan! Don’t ignore Yuuri-chan! Don’t give your names to anyone. If anything happens, call us immediately. No, get to safety, then call us immediately. Also, remember that this money is for food. If you come back with a giant stuffed dog or something, first of all I’m taking it and second, I’ll never let you out of Yuuri’s sight again because he’s the source of all my self-control and he’ll do wonders for you. Finally, if you or Yuuri-chan get tired or lost or anything, just call us and we’ll come get you.”

Victor speaks quickly and in Russian, apparently not wanting Yuuri and Yuuri-chan to understand.

Vitya rolls his eyes, but he nods.

“I know I do dumb things, but I’m not going to risk getting Yuuri-chan in trouble,” he says seriously. “He’s important to me.”

“I know.” Victor smiles at him, and his voice grows gentle. “Have fun, alright? You’ve been alone for too long. The world’s so much brighter when there’s someone with you.”

Victor turns and, returning to English, says something to Yuuri-chan. But Vitya isn’t really paying attention, too caught off-guard by Victor’s sudden tenderness towards him.

Sometimes Vitya forgets that Victor does understand him. Has had to bear the pain of loneliness, too. It’s just that Victor is happy, confident, and living a life that VItya envies. If he bears the scars of past burdens, he sure doesn’t show them.

But then, does Vitya really show his to other people? Maybe he should listen to Victor more…

“Yuuri, if there were body pillows of you anywhere in Russia, I would have them all already!” Victor says exuberantly, and Vitya remembers why he doesn’t listen to his older self that much. He’s missed the conversation entirely, and he can’t even imagine how they got on this topic, but Yuuri-chan is blushing and looking away.

“Time to go!” Vitya exclaims loudly, grabbing Yuuri-chan’s hand. “We’ll call you before we come back!” he adds as they walk out the door.

Finally, freedom.

“So, where should I take you first?” Vitya asks Yuuri-chan cheerfully.

“Anywhere is fine,” Yuuri-chan says, giving him a small smile.

“Okay… let’s stop for drinks,” Vitya decides.

* * *

As it turns out, it is a little difficult to navigate Saint Petersburg because, while the general layout is more or less the same as what he remembers, the shops he remembers have moved, gone out of business, or expanded in ways that leave him feeling like a stranger in his own city.

(Victor had had a point all along, but it doesn’t matter. Vitya’s a teenager and this is just a new adventure for him.)

“Look! Latte art!” Vitya exclaims, stopping as they pass a little coffee shop. “They can make puppies!”

Beside him, Yuuri-chan looks just as excited. 

“Let’s go in!” he says, his eyes shining happily. “W-Wait, it’s not too expensive, is it? I can’t read the sign…” he continues hesitantly.

Vitya just shakes his head.

“That doesn’t matter. It’s coffee with _puppies,_ ” Vitya insists, rushing inside as Yuuri-chan follows behind him.

They make their orders (Vitya having to speak for Yuuri-chan, because the employees don’t speak English) and find a table to sit at.

They both coo over their drinks.

“It looks just like a poodle, Yuuri-chan!” Vitya says joyously. “I love this place.”

“It looks just like my dog Vicchan,” Yuuri-chan says with a smile.

“Oh! I didn’t know you have a poodle too! Vicchan, you said? What a cute name!”

Yuuri-chan reddens.

“Uh… thanks…” he responds.

“So is Vicchan like a nickname? Like Yuuri-chan?” Vitya continues.

“Uh….” Yuuri-chan somehow manages to flush even deeper. “Yes, but we really only call him Vicchan.”

Yuuri-chan is about to take a sip of his coffee, but Vitya quickly holds out a hand to stop him.

“Wait! Let’s take a picture first!” Vitya suggests. “We can send it to Yuuri’s phone. I want to show them that we aren’t dying in the streets.”

“Oh, sure” Yuuri-chan agrees, his cheeks still tinted faintly.

So Vitya arranges their cups nicely in front of them, slings his arm around Yuuri-chan, and takes a photo.

He’s not sure why he needed them to be in it together. It’s not like he can keep the picture, after all (though maybe Victor and Yuuri will… He hopes they will…)

He opens Yuuri’s contact information (it’s saved in Victor’s phone with several hearts and a wedding ring emoji following it) and sends him a text.

— See, we found the best place to go

He attaches the picture of him and Yuuri-chan. Yuuri-chan’s smile is perfect, and… Vitya’s own smile is warm, too. (He almost forgets that he took the photo for the coffee, but… well, the foam poodles are still adorable, even if he didn’t quite get the camera angle to highlight them.)

He gets a quick reply.

— Cute. 

He shows Yuuri-chan, whose smile is quickly hidden when he takes a drink.

Vitya drinks as well. There’s more milk and sugar in his cup than actual coffee, but maybe that’s for the best. This isn’t a moment he wants to ruin with bitterness.

* * *

“So, Yuuri-chan, what do you normally do when you’re not skating?” Vitya asks when they leave the coffee shop. He doesn’t know where to go, and Yuuri-chan is content to follow him, so they just stroll along the street, going nowhere, really.

“I… uh…” Yuuri-chan hesitates. “I mean, I go to school and everything. But other than that… I don’t really do much else. I spend time with my family…”

“You’re like me,” Vitya says with a thin smile. “I don’t do much outside of skating, either.”

Only, Vitya doesn’t have a family to spend time with. He’s inherited money, not love.

It’s not like he feels that bad about it. No, he’s never really missed the family that he never attached to. But thinking about the differences between his and Yuuri-chan’s lives makes him feel… something. 

“Does it… hurt you to be away from them? Your family?” Vitya asks suddenly, breaking the silence that they had fallen into.

“I… I haven’t really been thinking about it,” Yuuri-chan answers, sounding slightly guilty. “I do miss them, but… Well, I’ve been away before, for competitions, you know, and… they don’t really understand what I do, anyway…”

“They don’t support you?” Vitya asks in shock. He didn’t think that Yuuri-chan’s parents sounded like the type, but…

“They do!” Yuuri-chan exclaims quickly. “They don’t understand, but they support me anyway. One time, my sister even…” He trails off nervously. “Sorry, you don’t really want to hear about that, do you?” He laughs sheepishly.

“Yes, I do!” Vitya insists. He wants to hear everything about Yuuri-chan. “What’s it like living with your family?”

“O-Oh… Well…”

And so Yuuri-chan tells Vitya about how his sister sometimes shows him off to her friends with a “this is my brother the skater; he’s ridiculously dedicated” and how his mother always makes him katsudon when he wins a competition and how his parents hold watch parties every time he skates even when it’s, according to Yuuri-chan “not anything special.”

“Wow!” Vitya says appreciatively. “It’s like having a fanclub filled with people you actually know!”

Vitya has a fanclub, but he doesn’t think he could remember their names or faces if he tried. He can only hear so many variations of “you’re the best skater, please take a picture with me” before everything starts to blend together.

“Ah… it sounds even more embarrassing when you put it like that,” Yuuri-chan murmurs, his face seeming to withdraw into the scarf he’s wearing. “It’s true they’re always cheering me on, though, so I guess I can see why you’d think that. Even when I fail, they never tell me to give up. They… they always believe I can get back on my feet…”

“Of course they do,” Vitya agrees.

Yuuri-chan’s face turns pensive and he doesn’t say anything more. So Vitya lets him think on his own, only breaking in every so often to ask if they should stop inside somewhere, to which Yuuri-chan always shakes his head.

Eventually, though, they do enter a store, because it’s cold and they’ve been walking for a while. 

Yuuri-chan finally comes out of his thoughts, and he laughs.

“A bookstore? I don’t think this is going to do me much good.”

Vitya laughs too.

“I wasn’t paying attention to where we were going,” he admits. “But maybe they’ll have something in English?”

There are, in fact, several English titles throughout the store, but none of them sound very interesting.

“I don’t want to learn how to become a successful business manager in six months,” Vitya complains as he puts another boring book back in its place. “Yuuri-chan, let’s leave. I’m hungry.”

But Yuuri-chan, who’s looking at a book a couple of shelves down, starts laughing and doesn’t answer.

“I wasn’t making a joke or anything,” Vitya says in confusion. “It is lunch time, after all.”

“It’s not that!” Yuuri-chan says through his laughter. “It’s just that I found a book with Victor and Yuuri’s faces on it.”

“What?” Vitya asks with a laugh as he peers over Yuuri-chan’s shoulder to view the book in his hands.

“I can’t read a single word of this,” Yuuri-chan says, handing it over.

“Onwards to Victory: The Story of Russia’s Living Legend and Japan’s Ace,” Vitya reads from the cover. He flips it open to a random page, reads a line, and immediately closes it.

“They didn’t authorize this,” he says, rolling his eyes.

“Really? What makes you say that?” Yuuri-chan asks, peering curiously at the cover again.

“It uses the phrase ‘friendship rings,’ Yuuri-chan,” Vitya says.

“About their engagement rings?” Yuuri-chan asks incredulously.

“Yes,” Vitya snickers. He snaps a picture of the book and sends it to Yuuri.

— You might want to clarify your engagement. Some writers seem to think you have “friendship” rings. 

He adds a few laughing emojis for good measure.

He gets a response quicker than he expected.

— That may be my fault. I gave a couple of vague interviews at first.

Then, almost immediately, the phone is assaulted with an onslaught of messages.

— HE THOUGHT I WAS JOKING  
— HE THOUGHT I WAS JOKING!!!!  
— WE PUT RINGS ON EACH OTHERS FINGERS AND HE THOUGHT I DIDN’T WANT TO MARRY HIM  
— HE ADSJIPWE

Yuuri apparently takes the phone back at that point, because the next message is clearly from Yuuri.

— Don’t worry about it. I’m sure the author of the book meant well.

Vitya rolls his eyes again and shows Yuuri-chan the messages.

“I guess it sort of makes sense,” Yuuri-chan says. “I’m not very good with public speaking… I guess I never get better…”

“That’s okay, Yuuri-chan,” Vitya says reassuringly. “The reporters always get everything wrong, anyway.”

“Everything?” Yuuri-chan repeats. “Do they get everything wrong about you, too?”

Vitya shrugs.

“I don’t know. What do you think?”

Yuuri-chan thinks for a minute, biting his lip nervously.

Vitya feels nervous, too, and he’s starting to regret even asking Yuuri-chan the question, but then Yuuri-chan speaks up.

“It’s not that they’re completely wrong, but they don’t really capture you as a person,” he decides. “Not all of you.”

“I feel like I’m just extending my programs, sometimes. My performances don’t always end when the music does,” Vitya admits.

Only, the difference is that he feels free on the ice, and he feels like crumbling off of it.

“Skating is my only beautiful quality, Yuuri-chan. You’ve seen enough of me now to understand that, right?”

And suddenly, Yuuri-chan’s arms are around him.

“Your performances are always perfect, Vitya,” he says with shining eyes. “But they’re hardly your only good point. I like you when you’re being yourself.”

“Seriously…?” Vitya feels like he’s about to choke. “You even have Victor to compare me to, and you can still say you like me?”

“I like you both,” Yuuri-chan says warmly. “I like you both, but… Don’t tell Victor, but I like you more. Because… because you can’t do a quad flip…”

“What?” Vitya asks, not understanding that logic.

Yuuri-chan flushes, removing his arms from around Vitya.

“That didn’t come out right. What I meant was that you… You can’t do a quad flip _yet,_ but you’re going to learn, and it makes me think that maybe… if someone as skilled as you can still improve, maybe even someone like me can get better, too…”

“Oh!” 

And now Vitya gets it. 

“So that means you don’t want to quit skating anymore!” he exclaims excitedly.

“R-Right.”

And somehow, knowing that it’s him, _Vitya,_ and not _Victor,_ and not even _Yuuri_ who apparently inspired Yuuri-chan makes him feel… great… special, even…

He presses his lips against Yuuri-chan’s, wrapping his arms around him as well.

The biography section of a large bookstore isn’t exactly the most romantic location for this to be taking place, but Vitya really can’t help himself.

And besides, Yuuri-chan doesn’t seem to mind, if the fingers grasping at his coat and pulling him closer are any indication.

When they have to break for breath, Vitya can barely contain a laugh.

“Yuuri-chan, you said you like who I am?” he asks, teases really, but it’s still sort of a genuine question.

“Yes,” Yuuri-chan breathes, his brown eyes filled with tenderness.

“Even if I’m a lovesick fool?”

Yuuri-chan, who’s still in Vitya’s arms, laughs.

“If that’s who you are, yes.”

So Vitya kisses him again, and for the first time in a while, his heart doesn’t ache at all.

* * *

It’s late in the evening when they decide to go back to the apartment.

The cold is a good excuse for Vitya and Yuuri-chan to have their arms around each other, and they’re still in such a position when they walk inside.

On the couch, Yuuri is sitting with his phone in his hand, tapping something on the screen. In his lap, Victor is resting his head, eyes closed peacefully.

Yuuri breaks into a smile as soon as he sees them. 

“Welcome back,” he says, and then he looks down at the man in his lap. “Victor, wake up,” he says, brushing his hand through Victor’s hair.

“Mm… Who said I was asleep?” Victor murmurs, his eyes fluttering open slowly so he can gaze up at Yuuri.

For once, Vitya doesn’t burn with jealousy when Victor sits up and nuzzles into Yuuri’s neck.

He does, however, press himself closer to Yuuri-chan.

Yuuri-chan blushes, but he’s smiling.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everybody! Even though it's only been a week since I last updated, this week felt REALLY long to me so I feel like... it's been forever... haha...
> 
> But anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Yurio finally shows up! I was always planning for him to show up eventually, but I just couldn't make it work until now. I love him so much, so I'm glad I was finally able to bring him in! ^u^

After three days of “vacationing,” during which time Yuuri-chan indulges Vitya in just about every silly romantic fantasy Vitya’s ever thought of ( _’We must really be soulmates,’_ Vitya thinks, _’because I’ve never had so much fun in my life and he’s not even trying to get me to stop.’_ ), their plans come to a screeching halt when someone knocks on the door.

Well, it’s more banging than knocking, really.

Also, yelling.

“Victor! Open the door you moron!”

Victor, Yuuri, and Yuuri-chan are all in the kitchen trying to cook… something, VItya doesn’t know what (it’s not katsudon and that’s all he’s interested in learning to make), so Vitya supposes they can’t hear the door… probably because there’s too much clinking and clanging going on already.

Vitya could say something, but since this is hilarious, he decides not to, instead leaning himself casually against the wall in the hopes of hearing more.

“Shit, you’re actually going to make me use the key? Dumbasses, it’s not like I want to live here! Treat your guests better!”

And suddenly the lock clicks and the door opens before Vitya can retreat to the kitchen with everyone else.

The boy who opens the door looks to be about Vitya’s age. His blond hair frames his face, and Vitya thinks he would look pretty if only said face wasn’t contorted in a scowl.

“Victor, what the hell? Were you just standing there the whole time? The— The _fuck?_ ” the boy says, doing a double take. “Gross, why do you look like that? Is this some kind of midlife crisis you’re going through? Does Katsudon know about this?”

“Uh… We aren’t having katsudon?” Vitya says, not quite sure what the blond is talking about. “Listen, this is all a misunderstanding. I’m not actually Victor! Surprise!” he says with grin. 

“What the hell? Explain yourself right now,” the boy growls, stepping closer. He attempts to kick Vitya in the shin, but Vitya stumbles backward just in time to avoid the hit.

It’s really not fair! Vitya didn’t even do anything this time! Why do these things always happen to him?

“Victor! Yuuri! There’s a guy in leopard print here and he’s scaring me!” Vitya screeches.

And apparently they hear _that_ because Victor comes running in. Only, he’s grinning, which Vitya thinks is an entirely inappropriate response for this situation.

“Yurio! You came home!” Victor exclaims, enveloping this “Yurio” fellow in a hug.

“What the fuck? What the actual fuck?” Yurio shouts, stomping on Victor’s foot in order to loosen his grip enough for him to escape the embrace. “If you’re here, who the fuck is he?” he asks, pointing to Vitya.

“Oh, that’s Vitya. He’s me but when I was 16. He travelled through time,” Victor explains casually, as if it were an everyday occurrence.

“Hi,” Vitya says with a wave. “I don’t exactly know what happened but I’ve been here for almost two weeks now.”

“Two weeks,” Yurio repeats, glaring at Victor. “You could have called or something.”

Victor shrugs.

“It’s not like it concerns you. And besides, we didn’t think you’d want to be bothered while you were with Otabek.”

“I wouldn’t have,” Yurio admits, crossing his arms. “But what the fuck, I’m gone for less than a month and shit’s already fucked up. Are there any other time travelers I should know about?”

“Uh… there’s me…” Yuuri-chan says quietly, walking forward shyly. Vitya immediately runs over to him.

“Yuuri-chan! Look at this guy! He was being mean to me!” he whines.

“Uh… well…” Yuuri-chan says awkwardly, patting Vitya’s shoulder. “He must have been surprised because he was expecting to see Victor…”

“Katsudon has a body double, too. Of course he does,” Yurio mutters.

“Hello, uh, Yurio, was it? I-I wasn’t eavesdropping, I just…” Yuuri-chan flushes faintly. “Anyway, I’m… Oh, I guess you know who I am. Everyone’s been calling me Yuuri-chan for the time that I’ve been here… uh, that’s almost two weeks. I got here the same time Vitya did. I don’t know how it happened, either.”

“Yeah, whatever. I might as well introduce myself. I’m Yuri Plisetsky, and I’m the best skater in this apartment,” Yurio informs them.

“Oh, I remember! Yuuri and Victor told us about you! You beat Yuuri at the Grand Prix Final and you beat Victor’s SP score, too, right?”

Vitya almost thinks that Yurio looks like he’s blushing. But Yurio’s still scowling, so maybe he’s just angry. He’s a confusing guy.

“That’s right, Mini Katsudon. I kicked their asses,” Yurio insists. Then, he sniffs the air, and his angry expression fades a little. “Are you making food? I hope you made enough for me, because I’m not going anywhere until I eat something.”

Victor laughs. 

“There’s probably enough for you, Yurio. Come back to the kitchen with us! Yuuri’s there!”

So Yurio pushes his way forward, with Victor following right behind him. Yuuri-chan and Vitya follow as well, but at a distance.

Vitya’s not feeling very happy about Yurio joining them for lunch, but when Yuuri-chan hesitantly grabs Vitya’s hand, he suddenly feels a lot lighter.

* * *

“I can’t believe you’re making me come with you on your gross date,” Yurio complains loudly. “It’s bad enough that Victor and Katsudon are always making me be their third wheel, now I have two sets of idiots to deal with.”

And Vitya has started to like Yurio. Really, he has. Despite a questionable affinity for cats that extends even to his clothing choices, Yurio has a cool taste in music, great skating skills, and a good heart, even if he tries to obscure it with a brusque personality. And Victor and Yuuri like him enough to give him a key to their apartment. So Vitya likes Yurio a lot, but _damn it,_ he’s ruining the mood!

“Nobody made you come with us,” Vitya argues, clutching Yuuri-chan’s hand tighter. “You can leave us whenever you want. Like now, for instance.”

“You invited me to come buy chocolate with you, and like hell I’m missing an opportunity to buy shit with Victor’s money,” Yurio responds dismissively.

Well, it was worth a shot.

“Then don’t complain about us holding hands,” Yuuri-chan says, stepping closer to Vitya as he does.

“Unless you want us to hold your hand, too?” Vitya jokingly suggests, reaching out with his spare hand.

“Ugh,” Yurio mutters in disgust. “Hurry up already. I need chocolate to get the taste of that awful idea out of my mouth.”

Vitya just laughs, but he and Yuuri-chan make no move to speed up.

And maybe their outing isn’t very romantic, but it’s fun nonetheless.

* * *

Yurio parts ways with them as they start to head back to the apartment.

“Bye, Yurio! Are we going to see you again?” Yuuri-chan asks eagerly.

Vitya’s pretty sure that Yurio _is_ blushing this time.

“Duh. Unless you decide to go live in a hotel or something. Victor and Katsudon would never get anything done if I didn’t show up to kick their asses into gear,” Yurio insists.

“Oh, alright. See you later!” Yuuri-chan says, giving a cheerful wave.

“Yeah. See you,” Yurio agrees, and then he’s gone before Vitya can even offer a farewell.

“Well. He’s really something,” Vitya says, wrapping his arms around Yuuri-chan’s shoulders and leaning against him. Now that Yurio’s gone, he can show Yuuri-chan his affection without getting growled at (now that he thinks about it, Yurio really is like the cats he so adores. Grumpy, always better than you, and yet somehow a little endearing anyway).

“Mm,” Yuuri-chan agrees, but that’s all he can say before Vitya is kissing him.

“How long have you been waiting to do that?” Yuuri-chan asks in amusement when they break away from each other.

“All day!” Vitya exclaims, putting a hand over his heart like it’s paining him. “But Yurio wouldn’t let me!”

“Ah, yeah,” Yuuri-chan mumbles, looking down. “It was fun hanging out with Yurio, but I wish he’d…” Yuuri-chan gets gradually quieter until he trails off entirely.

“What is it, Yuuri-chan?” Vitya asks gently.

Suddenly, Yuuri-chan is clinging to him, his arms thrown around his neck.

“We don’t have that much time together,” Yuuri-chan says softly, sadly. “And if I want to touch you, I don’t want him stopping us.”

Vitya is glad that Yuuri-chan’s arms are around him, because he feels weak, like he could sink to the ground if he weren’t supported. 

“Don’t say that so sadly, Yuuri-chan. We’ll have eternity together, remember?” he says, hoping his voice doesn’t sound as weak as he feels.

“But you know what I mean,” Yuuri-chan whispers.

And Vitya does.

Whatever power in the universe brought them together will soon separate them again. 

“We should be used to it, shouldn’t we? Time is always cruel to skaters,” Vitya says bitterly. “I don’t want to think about it.”

He wishes he could bury his sorrow as easily as he buries his fingers in Yuuri-chan’s hair.

Eventually, Yuuri-chan sighs deeply, and Vitya pulls away.

“Let’s just go home already,” Vitya says quietly.

“… To the apartment?” Yuuri-chan clarifies after a pause.

“Right,” Vitya says, sighing slightly.

Victor and Yuuri’s apartment has become home to him without him even realizing. But of course, “home” means something different to Yuuri-chan. He has family and friends to keep him safe and happy.

_’Whatever he thinks, the truth is I need him more than he needs me.’_

He wants to scream, to wail to the heavens that it isn’t fair, that he just wants him and Yuuri-chan to stay together in the future forever.

_’But if we don’t go back and skate, this future can never exist.’_

And Vitya can’t bear that.

It doesn’t make it any easier, though.

If he says anything right now, it’s going to come out in a whine, so Vitya stays quiet, merely squeezing Yuuri-chan’s hand as if to draw strength from it.

They walk in silence for a while, until suddenly Yuuri-chan comes to a halt in front of a store window.

“Vitya, I have an idea.”

* * *

“Friendship bracelets,” Victor says with slight amusement. “You stayed out late because you were making friendship bracelets.”

“Yeah, like your ‘friendship rings,’ only they didn’t cost as much money,” Vitya says with a grin, holding up his hand proudly. Red and gold threads entwine in a pattern around his wrist. Yuuri-chan’s bracelet sports the same pattern, but in blue and silver. “Look, we’re tied together now. See these knots? It’s symbolic.”

“The key to your heart has always lied in cheesy romantic gestures, hasn’t it?” Yuuri murmurs fondly, leaning against Victor.

“As long as you’re the one doing them,” Victor responds, wrapping an arm around his fiancé.

* * *

“Yuuri-chan, let me sleep with you,” Vitya practically begs that night.

“Uh…” Yuuri-chan blushes. “What do you mean…?”

“Oh!” Vitya laughs. “I didn’t mean that. I’m a gentleman! We’d go somewhere classy! This lame couch isn’t romantic at all!”

Yuuri-chan chuckles tiredly.

“This lame couch is comfortable, though,” he mumbles, laying his head against the pillow resting on the arm.

“It would be more comfortable with me sharing it,” VItya suggests hopefully.

“Oh, get over here already,” Yuuri-chan says. His eyes are closed, but his mouth is twisted in mirth.

“Yay!” Vitya exclaims happily, hopping onto the couch and immediately cuddling up to Yuuri-chan. “Now we can be together even when we’re dreaming.”

And after this, they never bother to sleep separately again.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost feel like this chapter is a filler chapter, but really, it's not... Well, okay, the Vitya/Yuuri-chan pair skate bit was mostly self-indulgence, but I couldn't let them go a chapter without a lovey-dovey scene, y'know?
> 
> Anyway, I hope you like the chapter! ^u^

Victor and Yuuri are content not to pressure them, but Vitya and Yuuri-chan decide for themselves that they’re ready to start practicing again.

“You’re doing great, Vitya!” Yuuri praises. 

“I know,” Vitya says proudly, but then he lets out a long-suffering sigh. “If only I could stop over-rotating,” he continues, coming off of the ice and draping himself across the bench like it’s the most tragic thing ever.

“If only you could stop _overreacting,_ ” Yurio remarks snidely, because for some reason he’s decided that he doesn’t have anything better to do than spend his evenings with them. “Get back on the ice and do it again, shithead.”

“So cruel,” Vitya whines.

“Shut up. Yakov would yell at you even more, you know,” Yurio grumbles.

“Yakov’s never called me a shithead before,” Vitya insists.

“I’m sure he’s thought about it,” Yurio mutters.

Vitya laughs at that.

“Probably,” he agrees. “But why are you over here, anyway? I thought you were going to watch Yuuri-chan?”

“Yeah, well, I was, but then Victor got all weird about it, and fuck that,” Yurio explains. “Just because I did a little ballet last year doesn’t mean I’m suddenly a ballet expert, and he’s trained under that… that ballet woman—“

“Are you talking about Minako?” a smiling Yuuri cuts in.

“Yeah, her,” Yurio says dismissively. “Anyway, Mini Katsudon doesn’t need help with ballet, that’s for sure.”

There’s something about the way he says it that seems off. It’s hard to tell with Yurio and his attitude, but…

“Oh, are you insecure?” Vitya asks with a grin that’s too casual.

“What? Hell no!” Yurio exclaims angrily. “I’m better at skating _and_ ballet than _you,_ ” he growls.

“Show me, then,” Vitya suggests, and it surprises Yurio to silence. “Yuuri, you won’t mind if Yurio teaches me a few things, will you?”

“Ah… I don’t mind, but…” Yuuri says hesitantly, glancing at Yurio.

“Fuck, you think I can’t handle this idiot, Katsudon?” Yurio says, scowling. He stomps over to Vitya, giving him a sharp kick to his shin. “Get your ass back on the ice! You’ll wish you had Yakov here when I’m through with you.”

“Okay, okay,” Vitya says with a laugh, not bothering to take his threat too seriously.

* * *

Yurio, surprisingly, continues working with Vitya without even being asked.

“I’m surprised, Yurio,” Vitya says quietly in Russian. “I thought you’d rather work with Yuuri-chan. I really expected you to turn me down when I told you to teach me.”

“You’re such a moron,” Yurio responds in kind. “I’ll teach you as long as you fucking listen. You’re not going to go back until you get your dumb jump right, and you have to go back. I can’t break your records if you don’t set them.”

“Is that your reasoning?” Vitya asks in amusement. “And here I thought you were starting to like me. But no, you just want me gone! I’m so sad!”

“Shut up,” Yurio grumbles, and Vitya thinks he probably would have kicked him if they hadn’t been on the ice. “It’s not like I want you _gone,_ but it’s going to happen anyway, so I might as well help you.”

“Aww, you do like me! Hmm, but you like Yuuri-chan even more than me, don’t you? Is that why you don’t want to help him? You don’t want him to leave?” Vitya continues to tease. He can’t help it, really; Yurio’s reactions are too funny.

“Where do you come up with this shit? It doesn’t matter what I want! I’m not a selfish bastard like you are!” Yurio hisses.

“Calm down, I’m kidding!” Vitya says at first, but then he pauses. “Wait, does that mean you really don’t want him to leave?”

“Fuck, you don’t get it,” Yurio says in frustration. “I saw Katsudon before he met Victor and he was a dumbass! Always flubbing jumps he could do because he didn’t believe in himself and crap. So no, I don’t want Mini Katsudon going back where I can’t kick his ass for that shitty thinking.”

“Oh.” Vitya can’t help but smile a little. Yurio really does care about Yuuri-chan.

“Stop looking at me like that! Get back to work already! Hey—“ Yurio shouts as Vitya pulls him into a hug.

“I’m glad you’re here for us, Yurio! I know Victor is too!” Vitya exclaims cheerfully, but his words are genuinely heartfelt.

“Get off of me, weirdo! We’re supposed to be training!” Yurio insists, his face reddening. “Katsudon! He’s having emotions! Come over here and deal with them!” Yurio yells, now switching back to English.

“It’s good to see you getting along!” Yuuri says, not bothering to come to Yurio’s rescue.

Vitya laughs and shoots Yuuri a thumbs up behind Yurio’s back.

“Ugh! Why are you so clingy?” Yurio complains, rolling his eyes. “You’re just like Victor.”

* * *

Practice is going well, but it’s the moments when they’re not practicing that VItya likes the most. 

“Hey, Yuuri-chan! Skate with me!” Vitya suggests, grabbing Yuuri-chan’s hands.

They’re through practicing for the day and it’s just them on the ice, Yuuri and Victor being locked in an intense debate with Yurio on the sidelines.

“Do you even know how to pair skate?” Yuuri-chan asks, tugging Vitya forward.

“Nope,” Vitya admits cheerfully, pressing a quick kiss to Yuuri-chan’s lips.

“Well, it doesn’t go like that,” Yuuri-chan informs him, his eyes gleaming with humor.

“Are you sure? I think it does,” Vitya says, repeating the action.

“If this is how you pair skate, I guess Yuuko and I have been doing it wrong for years,” Yuuri-chan jokes, and Vitya takes back one of his hands just so he can place it over his heart.

“You wound me, Yuuri-chan! You can’t skate with me like you do with your friend! We have _bracelets,_ ” Vitya says, bringing his bracelet to his lips much like he’s seen Victor do with his ring.

“Alright, then. Show me how I’m supposed to skate with _you,_ then,” Yuuri-chan suggests with a laugh.

“Okay. It’s like this,” Vitya starts.

He kisses Yuuri-chan’s hand, then skates backwards, drawing Yuuri-chan forward. He reluctantly releases Yuuri-chan’s hand and skates behind him, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“There. That’s how you do it,” Vitya whispers affectionately.

“Mm, very nice,” Yuuri-chan murmurs back in the same tone. “I’m afraid it loses points for presentation, though.”

“And why is that?” Vitya asks, nuzzling into Yuuri-chan’s neck.

“I can’t even see you half the time,” Yuuri-chan complains gently, taking Vitya’s hands and pulling them off him so he can turn around to face him.

As always, Yuuri-chan’s warm brown eyes leave Vitya enraptured.

“Oh, that is a problem,” is all he can say. He swallows thickly, and Yuuri-chan smiles at him.

“Keep your eyes on me?” Yuuri-chan demands, but a hint of hesitation creeps into his voice as he turns it into a question.

“I can’t look away,” Vitya assures him breathlessly, drawing closer.

So he follows Yuuri-chan’s lead. It’s not like when he skates his figure skating programs. It’s fun in a different way, and Vitya’s joyful expression mirrors Yuuri-chan’s as they glide around the rink with clasped hands.

“Hey! If you two don’t get off the ice we’re going to go home without you!” Yurio shouts, glowering at them. Victor and Yuuri don’t seem to be in any particular rush to leave, though, so Vitya doesn’t feel too bad about ignoring the statement.

“Oh, no, what would we ever do if they left us all alone?” Vitya asks rhetorically, snickering.

Yuuri-chan laughs and kisses him.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everybody! Guess who's finally on spring break! (lol I'm really bitter though because I have to write a 10-page paper for one of my classes... like, c'mon professor... it's supposed to be a BREAK. I mean, it could've been worse though... the paper could have been due the day of our midterm, and then I would have been in serious trouble.)
> 
> Uh, so, this might come as a surprise because I absolutely did not do anything to warn you it was coming, but this is actually the second-to-last chapter. I've written the last chapter already, too, but it needs... editing... so I might not get it up until tomorrow... we'll see.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

“Vitya, I don’t understand,” Yuuri says softly after VItya has fallen for the second time that day. “I know you got the hang of the quad flip last week, but you haven’t landed it once since then. Please tell me what’s wrong.”

What’s _wrong_ is that a week ago, he had figured out how to land a quad flip reliably. And then Yuuri-chan had excitedly told him that he had figured out how to reliably land the quad toe loop, and Vitya had cheered for him, of course, but he had also realized something important.

If they were here to learn a quad, and they had both picked up their quad of interest, then what reason was there for them to stay in the future?

So since then, VItya has been doing his best to forget absolutely everything he knew about landing the quad flip. Mostly, he’s been under-rotating on purpose and falling a lot. In retrospect, he’s pretty sure Yuuri knows he’s doing it on purpose, so maybe it wasn’t the best idea.

Yuuri’s worried gaze sends a rush of guilt through him. 

“It’s not because of you,” Vitya says quickly, because Yuuri blames himself for everything. But he doesn’t want to tell Yuuri what the problem is, because Vitya can already guess what will happen. He’ll look very sad, he’ll hug VItya, and it will be all very nice for a few minutes, but it won’t fix anything. Vitya will still have to go.

Yuuri has a tortured expression on his face, and Vitya just can’t stand it. He reaches out a hand, cupping it around Yuuri’s cheek.

“Don’t look like that,” Vitya demands.

_’Don’t look like that because of me.’_

Yuuri smiles sadly, taking Vitya’s hand into his own.

“I hate seeing you like this,” Yuuri says with a sigh. “I would do anything to help you.”

“You’ve done everything for me,” Vitya says, and he means for him _and_ for his future self. “It’s okay.”

He takes his hand back then, smiling gently despite the sadness he feels inside.

“It’s okay,” he repeats, turning away. “Just excuse me for a minute.”

* * *

“Victor, come talk to me. Privately,” Vitya insists.

Victor agrees easily. Yuuri-chan is doing fine on his own, anyway. 

But when they’re alone, everything Vitya wants to say dies in his throat.

_’What am I supposed to do? You’ve lived my life already. Just tell me how to get through it all.’_

“I can do a quad flip,” is what he says instead, hoping that Victor understands.

He does.

Vitya feels hands embrace him and he bites his lip. There’s more he wants to say, but he can’t get enough of a grasp on his emotions to begin to put them into words.

“Vitya, look at me,” Victor says.

Vitya looks up. Victor’s eyes are not as nice to look at as Yuuri’s (he supposes even narcissism has its limits), but he see the warmth in them.

“You’re going to be okay,” Victor says. “I’m okay, aren’t I? I don’t think of my life as sad.”

That’s a relief, isn’t it? But Vitya doesn’t exactly think of his life as sad, either, but… 

“You’re happiest now, though,” Vitya protests.

_’I’m happiest now.’_

Victor shrugs.

“Happier than ever before, but hopefully not the happiest I’ll ever be. Yuuri and I haven’t even had our wedding yet,” he says, grinning at the end.

“Right.” Vitya’s lips turn up at the corners.

He _wants_ to go back to his time so he can live his life. It’s just that he wants Yuuri-chan, too. And he’s grown attached to Yuuri and even Victor, as well. Yurio, too. It’s…

“Overwhelming,” he says out loud. “It’s overwhelming. I don’t…”

He doesn’t even know what he’s trying to express anymore, but Victor still understands, somehow.

“You know, if you can’t say it in words,” Victor suggests casually, “you could always say it with your skating. Isn’t that what we’ve always done?”

And something clicks into place in then, the first traces of a program coming to Vitya’s mind.

“That’s right.”

* * *

“I have something to show you all,” Vitya announces. Victor knows what he’s talking about, of course, so he just nods. Yuuri and Yuuri-chan look curious, while Yurio looks, well, grumpy like he always does, though he tilts his head forward slightly in interest.

“It’s not very polished. It doesn’t even have music yet,” Vitya admits. “But it’s important to me that you see it.”

He takes a deep breath, moves to the center of the ice, and starts to skate.

He doesn’t need music, because the music is something he feels in his soul. If he ever wants to use this program in a competition, he’ll have to get something commissioned, because there’s no song out there that can capture his feelings, as intricate and personal as they are, unless he writes it himself.

The first segment of his program is dedicated to Yuuri, not just as his coach, but also as the man who would do and had done everything for him, as the man who loves Victor and makes his future a happy one. His first jump is the quad flip, because that’s what he wants to show off, and it would be terrible if he got too tired or distracted later and messed it up. His landing is shakier than it could be, but that’s something he can fix in time.

The first segment flows seamlessly into the second, this one dedicated to Victor, his future self. Victor, who’s everything Vitya wants to be. A man Vitya has spent a lot of time envying, but also a man who understands Vitya perfectly. Victor’s signature move is the quad flip, but Vitya can’t repeat the jump, so he goes into a triple axel instead, because Vitya likes triple axels and Victor will understand.

The third segment is dedicated to Yurio, and filled with spins. Admittedly, it’s hard for him to capture the simultaneous grace and energy that the blond teenager somehow pulls off. Despite his prickly personality, he’s so close with Victor and Yuuri that he spends as much time with them as he does anywhere else. And no matter how much of a fuss Yurio makes, he’s always helped Vitya out. Really, it’s a shame that Yurio is only four years old in VItya’s time; if they were the same age, maybe VItya could finally have a friend at the rink… 

Finally, Vitya reaches the final segment. Even though the entire routine could be considered a love song of sorts, this is the part where it becomes most like a traditional romance, a chance to scream his adoration for Yuuri-chan to the heavens. Vitya thinks of everything. Yuuri-chan’s eyes, his laugh, his lips pressed against Vitya’s. The coffee shop, the bookstore, the rink, the apartment. Katsudon, coffee, chocolate. The bracelets that they made each other, hoping it would tie their souls together even across time. He incorporates a quad toe loop into a combination, hoping that Yuuri-chan will see it for what it is, a declaration of love that he’s more than willing to show with his actions but couldn’t possibly get right with words.

When he strikes his final pose, he’s met with silence, the only sound he can hear coming from his own heavy breathing.

“How was it?” he asks as he makes his way off the ice. “Do I still have my charms? I—“

Vitya’s words are cut off when a misty-eyed Yuuri-chan wraps his arms around him. 

“That’s why you’re the world’s greatest skater,” Yuuri-chan murmurs. “We could all feel…” He chokes off the end of his sentence, his hands clutching into the fabric of Vitya’s shirt.

When Vitya finally forces himself to tear his eyes away from Yuuri-chan, he finds that the others are wearing similar expressions. Even Yurio is missing his trademark scowl, and it makes his entire face look softer. 

Vitya turns his focus to his older self. Victor is staring at him with a far-off look in his eyes.

“I remember that program,” Victor says quietly. “Nobody ever properly understood it. Even I couldn’t understand it fully. Until now, I guess.”

* * *

When they all go to bed that night, there’s an unspoken understanding between them.

“Good night, Vitya,” Victor says, brushing his lips over the top of VItya’s hair.

“Good night,” Vitya responds.

_’Goodbye,’_ he thinks.

Yuuri brushes a hand through Vitya’s hair as he trails behind his fiancé to their bedroom. 

_’It’s fine. My future’s in good hands.’_

As he rests his head on Yuuri-chan’s chest, he entwines their fingers together.

“We’ll meet again,” he whispers. The bracelet on his wrist feels heavy as he squeezes Yuuri-chan’s hand. 

“Yes,” Yuuri-chan agrees. “That’s what I want. More than anything.”

Vitya shifts so he can press a kiss to Yuuri-chan’s lips.

_’I love you,’_ he thinks, but it would hurt too much if he said it now. No, he’ll save it for some moment in the future, some day when they can stay with each other and never leave.

So with his heart full of love, Vitya soon falls asleep to the lullaby of their heartbeats.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, folks, this is the end! I was always planning on ending it like this from the moment I started writing, but... I didn't realize how much it would hurt me to make them forget... But, guys, if they remembered, it would mess up the timeline!
> 
> Can I... Can I just write an AU of my own fic? 
> 
> But anyway, I hope you'll still enjoy the final chapter! I know it's shorter than usual, but that's because it's really more of an epilogue than anything. I told the story that I wanted to tell, so I hope you'll all be satisfied with the story as a whole.
> 
> Also, I'd like to take the time to thank everyone who's given kudos/bookmarked the fic/commented! I see all of these things and I just want you to know that I really appreciate your support! Without that, I'm not sure I would have found the motivation to finish this, so seriously, thank you all! <3

“Vitya… VITYA!” a voice says loudly, and Vitya blinks his eyes open.

The first thing he notices is that he’s on a bed, which is slightly unsettling because for some reason he was expecting to wake up on a couch. But that wouldn’t make sense, because Yakov always lets him take the bed whenever he ends up staying with him, and… wait, why was he staying with Yakov?

“By god, you were sleeping like you were dead,” Yakov says with less heat than usual. “Vitya, what happened last night?” he asks, but there’s no anger in his words. He looks… worried.

And now Vitya sort of remembers what happened. He won a gold medal, and he tried to talk to the silver medalist, and he got rejected, and it hurt. He had come to Yakov and practically passed out on the bed. He’d thought Yakov would be really mad about it and yell at him, but maybe… Maybe Yakov cared about him more than he thought.

“I… I think I learned something,” Vitya says quietly. And really, he isn’t sure how it happened, but he feels like, somehow, he’s changed as a person. 

He doesn’t know why he does it, because he can’t remember ever doing it before, but he wraps his arms around Yakov and hides his face in his chest. He feels his coach inhale sharply, but he isn’t pushed away.

“Thank you for everything,” Vitya says, though it’s muffled by Yakov’s shirt. He tilts his head back and smiles before he continues. “You’re the greatest coach anyone could ask for.”

Yakov stares at him for a moment, his eyes seeming to bore into Vitya’s soul.

“I still don’t know what happened,” Yakov says with a huff, “but it seems to have changed your attitude quite a bit. I don’t suppose you’re planning on actually listening to your great coach for the new season?” he asks, his voice carrying the slightest hint of humor.

“Oh, about that!” Vitya exclaims. “Actually, I have some ideas! I really want my senior debut to be special, so I want to do my own choreography,” he explains. The ideas he has in his head are foggy, but he thinks he can create a program from them. His eyes catch the red and gold bracelet encircling his wrist, and he feels like he’s doing the right thing.

Yakov follows his gaze, narrowing his eyes.

“Since when do you wear bracelets?” he asks.

In fact, Vitya can’t remember buying the bracelet, and, true, it isn’t the sort of thing he usually wears. But for some reason, this feels important to him. He runs his fingers over the material and smiles.

“It’s… a good luck charm,” he tells Yakov, but that doesn’t seem quite right. It’s more than that, but… “It’s to bring me luck in life and love.”

“You believe that?” Yakov asks incredulously.

“Of course!” Vitya says happily. “You should be excited, Yakov! My life and love all comes down to skating, anyway. You’re the one who’s always telling me to focus more.”

“It’s not about luck, VItya; it’s about hard work,” Yakov snaps.

Vitya just laughs.

“I know, I know!” he insists. “But it’s like… the bracelet’s tying me to the future. It’s symbolic,” he explains.

Yakov grumbles something under his breath, but Vitya isn’t about to let his coach’s usual attitude bring him down. His heart pounds in his chest, and he just knows that his future is going to be bright.

* * *

And over a decade in the future, Victor wakes up, his hands instinctively reaching out for the man next to him. Yuuri is already sitting up, so Victor pulls him back down.

“I remember now,” he says. The memories are hazy, like a half-remembered dream from long ago, but they're there. They're there and they're precious to him.

“So do I,” Yuuri murmurs, a small, hesitant smile on his face.

Victor doesn’t know if it’s a blessing or a curse that they’re only now remembering the temporal misadventures of their younger selves, but really, it’s fine either way. He’s got everything he’s ever wanted, now.

“I love you,” Victor breathes, taking in every inch of his fiancé’s beautiful form.

Yuuri flushes slightly, and his smile widens.

“I love you, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Haha... I do care about this fic, so if you see any obvious and easily correctable errors (i.e. not something I would have to rewrite the story to fix), please let me know! I want my readers to have a smooth reading experience!


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